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OP I ass|u|me y'all know about rednecks. [one of my favorite 'outlaw' tunes is Jerry Jeff Walker's "Up against the Wall, redneck mothers".] here are some excerpts from the 2002 edition of "you might be a redneck if...":
You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
Your property has been mistaken for a recycling center.
Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
You burn your yard rather than mow it.
The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
Your entire family sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
You come back from the dump with more than you took.
You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
Your grandmother has "Ammo" on her Christmas list.
You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.
You think a hot tub is a stolen indoor plumbing fixture.
You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
You have a rag for a gas cap.
Your father executes the "Pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.
Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does.
You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
You can spit without opening your mouth.
You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
You sit on your roof at Christmas time hoping to fill your deer quota.
The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
You thought the Unibomber was a wrestler.
You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.
Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home.
A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000 worth of improvement.
You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
Entire Thread Subject Posted By Posted more on red tsuwm 02/05/02 04:31 PM Re: more on red wwh 02/05/02 05:32 PM Re: more on red tsuwm 02/05/02 06:07 PM Re: more on red AnnaStrophic 02/05/02 06:35 PM Re: more on red wwh 02/05/02 06:50 PM Re: more on red tsuwm 02/05/02 06:52 PM Re: more on red wwh 02/05/02 08:44 PM Re: more on red milum 02/07/02 02:16 PM Re: more on red of troy 02/07/02 04:48 PM Re: blonde on blonde Capital Kiwi 02/07/02 10:43 PM Re: more on red hev 02/08/02 12:41 AM Re: more on red GallantTed 02/08/02 01:31 AM Re: more on red wwh 02/08/02 01:51 AM Re: more on red GallantTed 02/09/02 01:30 AM Re: more on red wwh 02/09/02 01:52 AM . Max Quordlepleen 02/08/02 06:41 AM Re: more on red Capital Kiwi 02/09/02 06:09 AM . Max Quordlepleen 02/09/02 08:50 AM Re: more on red stales 02/07/02 03:06 PM Re: more on red wwh 02/07/02 03:17 PM Re: more on red AnnaStrophic 02/07/02 03:41 PM
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