Dear Water Witch: Your "balneology" reminds me of elevator operator in Medical Building of BCH in forties. He smelled bad enough he could have been chemical warfare agent. But he had political connections, so complaints were fruitless. But one resident was outstandingly resourceful. He got on elevator, and kept looking at the Mephitus mephitus, and then looking away hurriedly when operator noticed him.
Finally operator demanded: "Wy you looka at me dat way?" The resident said in a surprised way:"Hasn't anybody ever told you you have a severe case of nowasheenuffie?" "Wats dat?" " A very serious condition that could turn into skin cancer." The operator had been around enough to know what "cancer" meant, and he would have turned pale, except dirt layer hid it. "Waddo I do about it?" The resident wrote out an Rx for Sapo mollis, well rubbed in, and removed with lots of water.
The stink went away, and operator was proud to continue fighting his nowasheenuffie. He was getting treatment.