In my opinion: the way to become an insider is to be friendly and polite, even while disagreeing. If there are any outsiders here, then they are self-made; and a good way to do that is to be impolite and disagreeable.

In this board's entire history, no newcomer who has been friendly and polite has ever been "told off". Any ugliness by "senior" members has been in response to ugliness.

I don't think it should come as a surprise to anyone who persists in attacking (be it mild or strong) despite having been asked not to, that the recipient(s) may eventually strike back.