tee-shirts and bumper stickers

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#94032 - 02/06/03 06:11 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
JohnHawaii member Registered: 01/17/03 Posts: 171 Loc: Hawaii, USA	And, just in case not everyone was offended, a few more: 1. Constipated People Don't Give A Shit ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2. Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3. If You Drink, Don't Park. Accidents Cause People ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4. Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5. If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6. Please Tell Your Pants It's Not Polite To Point ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 7. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 8. My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 9. Thank You For Pot Smoking ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 10. To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 11. If At First You Don't Succeed, Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 12. Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 13. If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 14. Horn Broken ... Watch For Finger ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 15. It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The Booger ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 16. If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 17. You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 18. The Earth Is Full - Go Home ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 19. I Have The Body Of A God ... Buddha ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 20. This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 21. So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 22. Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 23. If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 24. The Face Is Familiar, But I Can't Quite Remember My Name ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 25. Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 26. Illiterate? Write For Help ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 27. Honk If Anything Falls Off ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 28. Cover Me. I'm Changing Lanes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 29. He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles from The Next Exit ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 30. I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 32. I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 33. Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Handbasket? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 37. If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 38. Fight Crime: Shoot Back! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 39. If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over...[Seen upside down on a jeep] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 40. Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35 mph Are Also Timed for 70 mph. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 41. Guys: No Shirt, No Service Gals: No Shirt, No Charge ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 42. If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 43. Necrophilia: That Uncontrollable Urge To Crack Open A Cold One. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 44. Ax Me About Ebonics ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 45. Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 46. Boldly Going Nowhere ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 47. Cat: The Other White Meat ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 48. Caution - Driver Legally Blonde ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 49. Don't Be Sexist - Bitches Hate That ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 50. Heart Attacks ... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 51. Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 52. How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is Lost? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 53. If You! Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Riddle Them With Bullets. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 54. Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps The Kids In Touch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 55. Saw It ... Wanted It .. Had A Fit ... GotIt! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 56. My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 57. GROW YOUR OWN DOPE --- PLANT A MAN. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 58. All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 59. Some people are alive only because it is illegal to shoot them ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 61. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 62. BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 63. So you're a feminist...Isn't that precious. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 64. I need someone really bad...Are you really bad? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 65. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
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#94033 - 02/10/03 11:10 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
WhitmanO'Neill Carpal Tunnel Registered: 03/13/01 Posts: 4189 Loc: Rio Grande, Cape May County, N...	Here's a "few" more : TEE-SHIRTS: http://wordsmith.org/board/showflat.pl?Cat=&Board=miscellany&Number=58388 BUMPER STICKERS: http://wordsmith.org/board/showflat.pl?Cat=&Board=wordplay&Number=36310
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#94034 - 02/11/03 09:32 AM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
wow Carpal Tunnel Registered: 11/25/00 Posts: 3439 Loc: New England, USA	I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun! ------------------------------------- If it's Tourist Season, how come we can't shoot them?
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#94035 - 02/11/03 09:47 AM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
WhitmanO'Neill Carpal Tunnel Registered: 03/13/01 Posts: 4189 Loc: Rio Grande, Cape May County, N...	"previously, on AWAD..." Living here at a shore resort with a 3 1/2 mile boardwalk crammed with T-shirt shops I could fill a whole page. I've just about seen them all, from blue to cute, but sometimes a new slogan jumps out at you. This one turned my head and gave me a good chuckle last year as I walked down the "boards"...never saw it before or since, not even in any of the shops: NO MAAM National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood
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#94036 - 02/11/03 02:07 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
milum old hand Registered: 09/03/01 Posts: 872 Loc: Birmingham, Alabama	Here's a picture of me wearing my favorite T-shirt. I wear it (kinda like a joke) to lawn parties and social gatherings around Alabama. http://boatertalk.com/forum/BoaterTalk/325368
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#94037 - 02/11/03 03:02 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
sjm old hand Registered: 07/19/02 Posts: 742 Loc: Akina	>never saw it before or since, not even in any of the shops: NO MAAM Proof positive that you never watched Married With Children
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#94038 - 02/11/03 06:02 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
Coffeebean old hand Registered: 02/11/03 Posts: 725 Loc: Oregon, USA	Have you seen: Menopausal - Stay Back! and something I saw only once (no wonder)-- Colostomy is my bag.
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#94039 - 02/12/03 03:41 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
bonzaialsatian enthusiast Registered: 09/27/02 Posts: 261 Loc: London/Prague	I've often found postcards to be good for this kinda thing -here are a few I saw the other day or have stuck to my door: Nice Person, Wrong Planet I'm not wierd... I'm just special Please leave this planet as you would wish to find it (with a picture of a dog on the front) At least my dog looks at me when I speak to him... Bankers are people who lend you an umbrella when the sun is shining and then want it back when it starts to rain. And a personal favorite: Nothing right in left brain. Nothing left in my right brain.
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#94040 - 02/12/03 03:45 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
Faldage Carpal Tunnel Registered: 12/01/00 Posts: 13653	I have a T shirt with a picture of the Venus of Willendorf http://art.wlu.edu/venus of willendorf.jpg and the legend: Must Be Venus Envy
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#94041 - 02/12/03 03:45 PM Re: tee-shirts and bumper stickers
WhitmanO'Neill Carpal Tunnel Registered: 03/13/01 Posts: 4189 Loc: Rio Grande, Cape May County, N...	If it's Tourist Season, how come we can't shoot them? Ya mean we can't? ...oops!
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