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#7134 - 10/01/00 01:40 PM In Praise of Our Revered Winner
jmh Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 03/22/00
Posts: 1981
Congratulations Jackie for winning the Challange of the Fortnight.

As part of your prize here is a special thread in praise of the winner, where A Word A Day-ers can post messages of congratulation, eulogies, limericks, poems or anything else that comes to mind!



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#7135 - 10/01/00 02:00 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
jmh Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 03/22/00
Posts: 1981
Jackie. I don't want this to get too slushy (yuk) but I remembered this poem and thought you might like it. It came second in a BBC poetry vote (after "If")

I did think about translating it into Cockney rhyming slang but I thought better of it!

When I am Old
When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me,
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.

I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at one go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes to keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We will have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practise a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old and start to wear purple.
by Jennie Joseph


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#7136 - 10/01/00 10:09 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
Jo,

Thank you. I am honored. I like the fishie, too!

Love,

Jackie


P.S.--An added note: for a couple of reasons, I won't post a response to any more individual posts, of which there may not be any anyway, though each will get private thanks.

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#7137 - 10/02/00 06:26 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
maverick Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 09/15/00
Posts: 4757
Jollity greets all arrivals on site
An old hand extended in friendship’s delight.
Cleaving to wisdom like a fish to a bike,
Kudos is hers, as you-all know that she’ll like.
I offer respect to the thread BOSS of late –
Even though my spilt words may disorientate!



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#7138 - 10/02/00 07:37 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
paulb Offline
addict

Registered: 03/17/00
Posts: 460
Loc: Hobart, Tasmania, Australia
On 'ya, Jackie!


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#7139 - 10/02/00 12:07 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
TEd Remington Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 07/17/00
Posts: 3467
Loc: Marion NC
>When suddenly I am old and start to wear purple

Someone will always be asking me if they can kiss my ring!!

_________________________
TEd

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#7140 - 10/02/00 12:45 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
maverick Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 09/15/00
Posts: 4757
kiss my ring!!

!!


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#7141 - 10/02/00 04:13 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Jazzoctopus Offline
old hand

Registered: 07/03/00
Posts: 1094
Loc: Cincinnati & Loveland, Ohio, U...
Well, Jackie, in honor of your recent victory, I wrote a little number for you, and it goes something like this: 3


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#7142 - 10/03/00 07:27 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
a little number for you, and it goes something like this: 3


I agree.



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#7143 - 10/03/00 04:20 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
belMarduk Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 09/28/00
Posts: 2891
Congrats to Jackie
We're impressed with your talent
Three cheers from us all

bel



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#7144 - 10/04/00 01:14 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
AnnaStrophic Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 6511
Loc: lower upstate New York
I'm working on a limerick... but it's damned difficult to give equal time to two in 5-line verse. Congrats, meanwhile, both of y'all.
As for you, maverick... YOU should win an award for something... Your contribution was stunning. What do we call that form of poesy?


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#7145 - 10/05/00 12:38 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Bingley Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/09/00
Posts: 3065
Loc: Jakarta
Congrats to the fastest old hand in the West.

Bingley
_________________________
Bingley

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#7146 - 10/05/00 04:16 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
maverick Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 09/15/00
Posts: 4757
What do we call that form of poesy?

Thanks, Anna - how about slightly decsic?


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#7147 - 10/05/00 05:48 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Bridget Offline
addict

Registered: 06/27/00
Posts: 444
Loc: Sydney Australia
Jacks and Max, congrats!

Champagne all round - or since this is Oz, I'll make it a barbecue. And Jackie, I'll toast you till you're well done. Max, you're just rare!


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#7148 - 10/05/00 08:55 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
... the fastest old hand in the West

Dang it--there really oughta be an icon for evil grin, or at least a leer!

C'mere, Baby, and I'll show you how fast my hands can be!
(The rest of you may take a number.)


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#7149 - 10/05/00 10:11 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
>there really oughta be an icon for evil grin...

you'll just have to be satisfied with <eg> or B-)



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#7150 - 10/05/00 05:11 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
I still feel very uncomfortable receiving any plaudits for my effort. The terms of the contest keep pestering me, like Banquo's ghost: "Continuing a regular theme, here is a challenge for those of you who do not speak (predominantly) British/UK English as your first language."
Surely if the IOC can call a 16 year old girl a cheat for taking an NSAID, I should be pilloried with equal ruthlessness and savagery for entering a contest whose rules disbarred me. }8^(


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#7151 - 10/05/00 05:17 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
in the spirit of Max' demurral, thumbs up for Jackie and a big desuperpollication for Max.


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#7152 - 10/05/00 09:14 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
a big desuperpollication for Max.

No way, uh uh, no fair, I won't allow it! Max SAID that he
wasn't intending it to be a real entry. Even with that
disclaimer, he still got his award. So he can most certainly accept accolades, darn it! Max, don't you DARE
try to weasel out of this again! Grr.




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#7153 - 10/06/00 03:46 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
jmh Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 03/22/00
Posts: 1981
>for those of you who do not speak (predominantly) British/UK English

I have posted a reply to this issue in the main competition thread. The rules were clear and you were a clear winner of the "prize for the fastest entry by a Kiwi". Not only were you the winner but you were also the only competitor! If you are looking for Olympic analogies, you only have to think back to early stages of the swimming where there was an unlikely medalist who had never been in a race before.

On the other hand ...

You raise the issue of drug testing. I think this might be a good idea to incorporate into future competitions!



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#7154 - 10/06/00 05:44 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Bridget Offline
addict

Registered: 06/27/00
Posts: 444
Loc: Sydney Australia
Official judges' report:

'We were impressed by Max's new zeal and enthusiasm, but in the end we realised Jackie's for US.

So the verdict is - Jackie, Max is out!'




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#7155 - 10/06/00 06:07 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
Jackie, Max is out

No, he ain't--I've handcuffed him to me. If he's out,
I'm out. I ain't standin' on this-here podium
bah mahsay-ulf!
(OUCH! Max, stop that tugging! Stop it, I say!)


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#7156 - 10/06/00 07:07 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner/s
paulb Offline
addict

Registered: 03/17/00
Posts: 460
Loc: Hobart, Tasmania, Australia
Here's a small tribute to the winner/s (with apologies to Lewis Carroll):

The Jackie and the Quordlepleen
were posting on the board.
They smiled with glee at all the words
they had within their hoard.
‘If these were ever cleared away,’
they said, ‘We would be bored.’

‘The time has come now,’ Jackie said,
‘To talk of many words.
Of tenses — YARTS — and similes —
of anagrams — and glurds —
and welcomes to the posters new —
and fish on bikes — and nerds.

"But, wait a bit, Old Hand,’ said Max,
‘Before we finish here,
D’ye think the others may catch up —
They’re getting mighty near?’
‘I doubt it.’ said our Cheshire Cat
and grinned from ear to ear.


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#7157 - 10/06/00 10:03 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner/s
RhubarbCommando Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 08/23/00
Posts: 2204
I admire paulb's gentle eulogy a great deal; however, I feel that an epic victory demands an epic poem

with apologies to Lord Macaulay

How Jacqulynia swept the Board

The Max Q, of down under, by the ninth tense has sworn
That the grand prize of jmh would off by him be borne
By the ninth tense he swore it, and wore the night away
And bade his messages go forth, East and West and South and North,
To scatter disarray.

East and West and South and North the messages went fast
And all the noble posters noted he was first to blast.
Shame on the false awad-er who lingers in their bed
When Max Q of down under has said what he has said.

in the interests of brevity, we switch to the beleaguered gates of Home page

Then up spake brave Jacqulynia, the keeper of the board,
“To everyone upon this site, this challenge strikes a chord;
What better way of posting than by facing dreadful bods
Who mangle our pure language with words like ‘dames’ and ‘rods.’”

“I’ll put in my bridge, Sir Consul, with all the speed I may;
With a pair of words beside me, this upstart I will flay.
In yon strait thread, a thousand may well be stopped by me
I’ll take a mouse in either hand and write a word or three.”

Once more, the interests of brevity demand a jump through hyperspace

They gave her of the board space which was of common right
As much as three strong fishes could cycle from morn ‘til night
And builded her a statue, with her story writ on high
And there it stands until this day, to witness if I lie




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#7158 - 10/06/00 10:36 AM Re: In Praise of Max, who deserves special notice
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
apologies to Joyce Kilmer, Mad® and Schlitz®

I think that I shall never hear
A poem lovelier than beer.
.
.
Poems are made by fools, I fear
But only Hoegaarden can make a beer.



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#7159 - 10/06/00 10:48 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner/s
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
Jacqulynia swept the Board

This is certainly appropriate, since I am now a mess-handler!


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#7160 - 10/06/00 10:52 AM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner/s
maverick Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 09/15/00
Posts: 4757
now a mess-handler!

... but glad to hear you've got the rubber gloves, old hand!


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#7161 - 10/06/00 04:27 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
(Sorry Sam)

I heard, and in my soul discern'd
two voices in the air

"Is it he?" quoth one, "is this the Max?"

The other was a softer voice
As soft as honey-dew:
Quoth he, "The Max hath penance done,
And penance more will do."

Forthwith my this frame of mine was wrench'd
With a woful agony,
Which forced me to begin my tale;
And then it left me free.

Since then at an uncertain hour,
That agony returns,
And till my ghastly tale is told,
This heart within me burns.

He playeth best, who keepeth best
All rules both great and small.


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#7162 - 10/06/00 04:38 PM Re: In Praise of Our Revered Winner
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
'We were impressed by Max's new zeal and enthusiasm'

Very droll, but here's the real test: New Zealand has two official languages, can you pull a stunt like that with the other official name for my country? If you need help spelling it, check my profile. Consider this challenge Max's revenge - open to all, prizes (penalties?) to be determined. The challenge will run for a sennight starting now, that is 06/10/2000 22:37 ITC (GMT for the traditionalists)


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#7163 - 10/06/00 05:47 PM Re: Max's revanche
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
hmmm... difficult, but not impossible.

when I were a lad, we had a dog, a setter, named Mao and my baby sister had a lop-eared rabbit named Oarl. Mao was as gentle as the proverbial lamb, except that he would tear a rabbit a new ear-hole given the chance. well, one day the rabbit ran and sis came home in tears, screaming:
"Mao tear Oarl's ear!"



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#7164 - 10/06/00 07:34 PM Re: Max's revanche
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
Well done, tsuwm. Since NZ's largest city is known as "The City of Sails", and in keeping with NZ's nautical heritage, I have decided to award line honours to tsuwm. The overall winner will still be decided at sennight's end. Tsuwm's prize is available here:
http://www.driveway.com/share?sid=9f78513f.cfaaa&name=prizes&view=0

The wordplay involved may be feeble, but it is in Ernest


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#7165 - 10/07/00 11:21 AM Re Aotearoa
RhubarbCommando Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 08/23/00
Posts: 2204
As 'orrible curses may give you a 'ot ear, oaths should 'ardly hever be used.




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#7166 - 10/07/00 11:51 AM Re: Re Aotearoa
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
City of Sails? coincidentally, when I was in the Philippines, I had a tamarao tear my genoa, nearly goring our bull. 8-)



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#7167 - 10/07/00 02:57 PM Re: Max's revanche
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
>Tsuwm's prize

hmmm... two ends of a black belt... I'm... erm... speechless.


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#7168 - 10/07/00 03:01 PM Re: Re Aotearoa
Jackie Offline

Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 11610
Loc: Louisville, Kentucky
When in Bilbao, tear oafishly through the town.


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#7169 - 10/07/00 09:50 PM Re: Re Aotearoa
Bingley Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/09/00
Posts: 3065
Loc: Jakarta
Professor Wellington worked for the United Nations, and had a reputation for being something of an irascible chap. If there was one thing the good professor was very particular about it was his morning cup of cha. Now, you would think the Food and Agricultural Organisation would be able to provide a decent cuppa, wouldn't you, given their remit? Not a bit of it. As far as institutional beverages go, it really was the pits. So, Professor Wellington used to keep his own private supply of a really exquisite Lapsong Souchong in his office. One never-to-be-forgotten day, somebody had tampered with this nectar. The professor took one sip, and "FAO tea," roared he, in tones that shook the building to its foundations.

Bingley
_________________________
Bingley

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#7170 - 10/07/00 09:56 PM A Poem for tsuwm Re: Max's revanche
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
Ask not for whom the belthole's,
The belthole's for thee



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#7171 - 10/08/00 05:37 AM Aotearoa
Bridget Offline
addict

Registered: 06/27/00
Posts: 444
Loc: Sydney Australia
It is a little-known fact of modern history, but once Mao Zedong and his troops had finished the Long March and settled in Yenan, North China, the Great Statesman was not happy. He missed the locally brewed tea of his childhood, missed it so badly that in fact one chill winter morning he got up and without even waiting to put on his red star cap set off back to his native village of Shaoshun. Fortunately, the Nationalists were by now in retreat, so his path was more direct than the Long March, but it was still long. At last, he reached his childhood village and was able to enjoy the particular earthy tea. He supped two cups, smacked his lips and set off back to Yenan to lead the Revolution.

His colleagues were awed by the great man's determination and persistence in undertaking a second long trek, but he insisted they keep it secret. It was only after his death that they were able to tell the story and establish commemorative signs at key points along the road he had taken.

The Mao Tea Road was famous for a brief while, but alas, like the man himself, it has fallen into relative obscurity. The signs have been lost, chopped down or worn away. Visiting China a few years ago, the only relic I could find of this fascinating trip was a worn piece of board, ragged at both ends, reading '..AO TEA ROA..'


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#7172 - 10/08/00 05:40 AM Re: Aotearoa
Bridget Offline
addict

Registered: 06/27/00
Posts: 444
Loc: Sydney Australia
Alternatively, do you know about the man who went for a swim and got washed out to sea? As he watched the land receding, he could see a fisherman in his dinghy, floating at anchor between him and the coast.

'Hey!' he called. 'Hey!'

The fisherman looked round, confused.

'Hey!' the swimmer called again. 'Out 'ere, rower!'


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#7173 - 10/08/00 08:07 AM Re: Aotearoa
tsuwm Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 04/03/00
Posts: 10525
Loc: this too shall pass
:^D
Bridget, to coin a word, those were logostellar!


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#7174 - 10/08/00 02:35 PM Re: Aotearoa
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
'Hey!' the swimmer called again. 'Out 'ere, rower!'

Magnifique! With your Jazzoctopus-like contribution as well, I have to say that you're currently leading the fleet in the race for overall honours.




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#7175 - 10/09/00 05:41 AM Re: Aotearoa
Bridget Offline
addict

Registered: 06/27/00
Posts: 444
Loc: Sydney Australia

(not sure what else to say....)


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#7176 - 10/09/00 07:51 AM A Poem for tsuwm Re: Max's revanche
RhubarbCommando Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 08/23/00
Posts: 2204
Ask not for whom the belthole's,
The belthole's for thee


At the risk of diminishing you all if this one dies the death, I have to say

"Well Donne."



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#7177 - 10/13/00 05:02 PM And The Winner Is - Re: Max's revanche
Max Quordlepleen Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 3409
With the sennight up, Max's revanche concludes. The overall winner may collect her prize here:
http://www.driveway.com/share?sid=9f78513f.cfaaa&name=prizes&view=0

If the rebus seems tautological, please forgive me.



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#7178 - 10/13/00 09:12 PM Metaphysical
AnnaStrophic Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 03/15/00
Posts: 6511
Loc: lower upstate New York
"Well Donne."

Rhub, I've seen this thrice and am still chortling in my glee.


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