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stranger
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OP
stranger
Joined: Apr 2002
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Hello Friends
My name is Goldilocks and I'm your new AWAD Moderator
Being a former Ludo Lovely, my credentials for the job are impecable and you are soooo privleged to have me here. Indeed, it's time they brought someone like me here in order to raise the standards and freshen the place up.
Thus, from now the following rules and strict dress code will have to be adhered to by all members and visitors:
*Neat attire is essential when visiting this Forum
*No Teddy bears allowed
*No slippers or track suits may be worn by any member while visiting this Forum.
*All finger nails must be well manicured and garish nail varnish is strictly banned
*Absolutely no teddy bears allowed
*Evening dress must be worn after 8.00 pm
*All good looking men must be freshly showered and clean shaven (I plan to open an exclusive room for you guys!!!! - watch this space)
*Members shall at all times address me as Ms Goldilocks (former Ludo Lovely)
POSITIVELY NO TEDDY BEARS ALLOWED - Got that GallantTed?
Well friends, I trust that all the changes will ensure that your visits here will be all the more enjoyable. Keep young and beautiful now!
Signed: Goldilocks (Ms) (Former Ludo Lovely)
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Carpal Tunnel
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POSITIVELY NO TEDDY BEARS ALLOWED - Got that GallantTed?So, then, is this some sort of cronyistic plot involving our one and only TEd Remington, "Goldi"?...hmmmm?  
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old hand
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old hand
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men must be freshly showered and clean shaven (I plan to open an exclusive room for you guys
So you're saying we need to shave our heads to join your club?
Heil, Frau Goldilocks!
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Carpal Tunnel
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Jazz-o: men must be freshly showered and clean shavenAn egregiously cropped quotation, Jazz-o! The exact quotation (emphasis added) is: *All good looking men must be freshly showered and clean shaven[sigh of relief -e] Fortunately, that lets me off the hook!
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*Evening dress must be worn after 8.00 pm
Ahhhhh. Jammies! 
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veteran
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veteran
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Jazzo, can we get together a group to give a rousing chorus of "FANGUL GOLDI!!"??
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addict
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*No Teddy bears allowed
*No slippers or track suits may be worn by any member while visiting this Forum.WooooooooHooooooooo, I can go bare foot! As long as I don't have a teddy bear with me!
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Carpal Tunnel
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>Former Ludo Lovely
hoooah!
(insert witticism here)
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old hand
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old hand
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> No slippers or track suits may be worn by any member while visiting...
You're saying members should be covered? I'm sorry. I'm obviously mistaken. I thought this was a naturist site.
stales
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I thought this was a naturist siteWell, I know ONE Board member who'd like that, she said enigmatically. And, stales, Honey...if YOU come...er...what you said...well, all I can say is I hope the house is built well. 
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What happens when the THREE BEARS come home? Leave that porridge alone!
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What happens when the THREE BEARS come home?
Why do you think our presumptuous Ms Lox thrice uttered the incantation No Teddy bears allowed?
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Dear Seniorita Goldilocks,
I see the 'time of day' is something you haven't been *given enough to... or more appropriately in this case, have *taken from yet, so allow me:
A sirtain welcome iz in order here, and I'm glad you crossed the pond to spread yer werds, whatever color they may be.
Ya dew knead too werk on yer spellin'. I no GallanTed haz already given ya lessonz, but I see it ain't sticken. Some glew mite'elp.
Me good natured chum has been G-Ted enough on your behalf and it iz quite *clear the young man haz been here a wee bit befour you, so yer in no position to be banning the werds and deeds of our favorite Spelling Bee moderator. (I speak for me and my shadow when I say "our")
May I repeat that, yer welcome to bring yer own sense of *moderate werds, but it's a bit late to be applying dress code, as I haven't a shred of clothing that falls into yer criteria. I bite my nails at will (all the tension, ya know), and being the most good looking guy on the board, I stand as a model citizen with plenty of extra facial hair and most often with my own scent. These both reserve me an abundance of extra scratch fer werkin on my 12 ounce curls (I must, at least, keep in shape for the ladies).
It is, however, good to see a bit of the old "Wordplay and Fun" up here in the "Information and Announcements" file, but it won't be the last time you'll hear this little ditty : "We don't need no steenking rules".
Signed,
Juan Antonio Carlos Esperanto Rodrigo Maria Chavez
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Juan Antonio Carlos Esperanto Rodrigo Maria ChavezI think there's only room for won Juan around here...
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I think there's only room for won Juan around here...Praps so...praps so.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Whatever became of Miss Merde-rator?
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Errr... What's a Ludo Lovely? Or should I ask?
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Perhaps a luscious lover of lascivious interludes?
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Carpal Tunnel
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What's a Ludo Lovely? Over on the other side of the pond they *gamble with ludos Oh, that would be your side. I believe we have a very similar thing here that has been recently called the "why's", but neither side of the *pond will fess up to this reality! I'm sure GallantTed will be able to clarifie, unless, of course, he's still buildin' that 42` fence between him and his *neighbor . See what you get for aks'n!
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Were we supposed to draw any conclusions from the date of the original post on this thread?
(Watch out, Ludo, the goblins'll find out you're here!)
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stranger
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OP
stranger
Joined: Apr 2002
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Well friends
After conducting a number of spot checks on your general grooming, it has come to my attention that none of you have taken my new rules seriously. What's more, I can still get a whiff of that darn teddy bear - I know he's around here somewhere. Shame on you all - especially those of you who are providing a safe house for that cloth-earred, mange-ridden twit.
However, all this is of little consequence to the superior likes of me, for I have been head-hunted by very important people in very important places who require me to do some very important work, in a GTed-free zone. So there - their gain is your loss.
Goldilocks (Ms)(former Ludo Lovely)
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Were we supposed to draw any conclusions from the date of the original post on this thread?
I think we were meant to draw conclusions from the post as a whole.
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enthusiast
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Howye fokes
I think someone was pullen Loxy's leg when they told her that she'd got the job of AWAD moderater. I wonder who meself...
Anyways, I see that her head has being hunted - fair play ta whoever did that ta her. I hope they were waren gloves though - cos I wouldn't touch that bleached head of hers in a fit.
Between yerself and meself, word on the street has it that the real reason she left was cos AWAD wouldn't give her a space in the parken lot ta park her high horse.
Now fer ya
GallantTed
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Dear Gallant Ted: Please tell the truth: Do you sometimes sing soprano?
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enthusiast
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Howya Dr Bill
How is things with ya? I'm not sure what yer question implys - or infers fer that matter. It could mean loads of different things. I might even have ta sing dum on this one but....
I'm not a grass, if that's what ya mean. I was never in the mob neither (not that they never tried ta head hunt me - everyone wants a piece of Ted, ya see).
MadDogTed, believe it or not, has a beautiful singen vice. He might be a few bob short of the full shillen - but he's a grate tenner altagather. I, meself do be doen a bit of singen in the shower.
Hope this answers yer query
Be seein ya
GallantTed
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Dear Gallant Ted: If you and Goldilocks sang, would it be a solo or a duet?
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a solo or a duet?
Perhaps a duet via xöömi.
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old hand
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old hand
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If you and Goldilocks sang, would it be a solo or a duet?
If a person with split personalities threatens suicide, is it a hostage situation?
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enthusiast
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Howye fokes
I answered Dr Bill's query hours ago - but as it's not on screen, I can only demise that I fergot ta post it! Sorry about that fokes.
Anyways, I was sayen that as I only sing in the shower it would be a fierce crime against everythin if I sang a duet with THAT woman.
Ya can rest insured though, that we're two completely different characters. (I'm an A major and she's a F flat).
Hope this answers yer query and it posts this time.
GallantTed
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If the peripathetic Ms. Lox thinks she's gone make us moderate she's got another think coming.
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The ancient ayleur has spoken.
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I'm an A major and she's a F flat
So, that's only a one note difference! Would you call it a D Sharp or an E flat? (I'm quite sure whichever it *is yer neighbor will give you the ol' 180).
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old hand
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old hand
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I'm so confused by this thread. Anyone care to enlighten me? The more I read it, the more it reminds me of Kubla Khan....it must be all about sex.
No, really: what is everyone smoking over here? I'll take a pound of it.
HELP! Whaaaaaat?
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enthusiast
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Howya Modest
Ya see, it all started when meself and MadDogTed decided ta play a April Fool's prank on Goldilocks (check me profile fer details on her).
Anyways, we sent her a email tellen her that she got a job of moderater on AWAD. She fell fer it and ya've read the result (furst post in this thread).
Then when no one was taken her seriesly, she resigned sayen that she got a better job somewhere else. Of course, we all know it was cos she couldn't find a space ta park her high horse.
After that, Dr Bill started asken meself and Goldilocks ta sing fer him. Ta be honest, I got a bit lost at this pint meself, but I played along just ta humour him and all the other loonyboonies that posted after him. Mabee he has his eye on Loxy or somethin.
I'll tell ya, modestgoddess, sometimes I think I'm the only one around here with any since - and me just a little teddy bear.
Hope this answers yer qurey
GallantTed
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Of course, we all know it was cos she couldn't find a space ta park her high horse.A horse is a horse, of course, of course. Especially when you breed it, saddle it, teach it to trot, hand the bridle over to an unsuspecting *suspect and slap the thing on the arse while yellin "yeee-haaaw" at the top'o yer mourning.  ModGod - When you can take the pebble from my hand you may leave, grasshopper... After that, Dr Bill started asken meself and Goldilocks ta sing fer him.After such an underwhelmingly *moderate response to the ludo lovely, I'll be missing the opportunity to sing in that trio. I sure hope she realizez it was yer horse, G-Ted, and that it would have jumped off the cliff if ya hadn't of stepped in at the last minute and sung yer sweet lullaby. I commend yer gentlemenly approach to the whole issue! Besides, what wood fun be without games?
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old hand
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ooooooohhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHH. I get it. Sort of.  Hey GallantTed honey, you is nearly a member. Keep up the gud wurk.
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