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#209436 - 02/06/13 10:37 AM Funeral Notice
LukeJavan8 Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 6605
Loc: Land of the Flat Water

Funeral Notice
===============

It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following
news:

The Pillsbury Doughboy dies yesterday of a yeast infection and
trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin.

Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects,
including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins,
Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and Captain Crunch.

The gravesite was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered
the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never
knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show
business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was
not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on
half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flakey at times he
was still a crusty old man and was considered a roll model for
millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John
Dough and Jane Dough, plus they have one in the oven. He is
also survived by his elderly dad, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
_________________________
----please, draw me a sheep----

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#209439 - 02/06/13 05:36 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: LukeJavan8]
olly Offline
old hand

Registered: 12/18/06
Posts: 956
Loc: Auckland, New Zealand
He's toast.

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#209440 - 02/06/13 06:25 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: LukeJavan8]
Tromboniator Offline
old hand

Registered: 05/10/10
Posts: 832
Loc: Alaska
Buried in his loafers, no doubt. Popular, though frequently panned.

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#209442 - 02/06/13 08:48 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: LukeJavan8]
Buffalo Shrdlu Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 06/24/02
Posts: 7210
Loc: Vermont
I heard he had a Do Nut resuscitate order.
_________________________
formerly known as etaoin...

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#209443 - 02/06/13 10:39 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: Buffalo Shrdlu]
jenny jenny Offline
veteran

Registered: 06/05/10
Posts: 1554
Loc: Lower Aberdeen, Mississippi
Poor Doughboy, he can't win. If in Heaven he will only be half-baked, and if in Hell he will likely be overdone.

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#209448 - 02/07/13 11:23 AM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: jenny jenny]
LukeJavan8 Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 6605
Loc: Land of the Flat Water
Hey!
All your replies are really terrific. I needed a good laugh.
_________________________
----please, draw me a sheep----

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#209480 - 02/09/13 03:23 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: LukeJavan8]
Rhubarb Commando Offline
old hand

Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 1074
Loc: Lancaster, UK
Although Doughboy was not quite so well known in Europe, a memorial service was held in Madeira to commemorate his colourful life. It was attended by a number of fans, including Mr Kipling, Mother Pride and ( it is rumoured) the Bakewell Tart! – although the lady concerned may just have been a piece of local cheesecake just there to sponge of the fans at the meal that followed.
The officiating cleric gave an eulogy based on Leviticus 24:5 which went down very well. He also mention that Doughboy’s schemes had frequently been “knocked down” and declared to be bloomers, but he had often been proved and had risen nicely afterwards.
The food at the wake was rather disappointing, as the steak was a bit hard to choux.
_________________________
I'm immortal until proven otherwise

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#209484 - 02/09/13 08:02 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: Rhubarb Commando]
LukeJavan8 Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 6605
Loc: Land of the Flat Water
Lovely, simply, Rhuby.


ten cakes, or whatever, two ephahs apiece.


Edited by LukeJavan8 (02/09/13 08:07 PM)
_________________________
----please, draw me a sheep----

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#209485 - 02/09/13 08:05 PM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: LukeJavan8]
LukeJavan8 Offline
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 6605
Loc: Land of the Flat Water
Reminds me of another years ago when Alka Seltzer stopped
using its icon "Speedy".(although he is back again, I see)

NOTICE:
Speedy Alka Seltzer has committed suicide. Unfortunately his
body could not be found; He simply jumped into a glass of
water and immediately effervesced. He did, however, leave
behind a suicide note, which read "Plop, plop, fizz, fizz,
Oh what a relief it is".
_________________________
----please, draw me a sheep----

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#210846 - 05/09/13 01:54 AM Re: Funeral Notice [Re: LukeJavan8]
Keira Offline
stranger

Registered: 05/09/13
Posts: 6
He also discuss that Doughboy’s techniques had regularly been “knocked down” and announced to be bloomers, but he had often been shown and had increased perfectly afterwards.
_________________________
small business consulting

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