Ego wall – New Guinea expression, means he’s gone to prison
Golden ghetto – community of pop stars living on right hand side of Golden Square in Aberdeen
Minds-on – response given by “flat-nose” Kelly on hearing that his accomplice’s torch had gone out
Hillbilly heroin – the kind of female goat all the mountain men look up to
Wallet biopsy – Letlaw was a cold war spook noted for his dyslexia. This was the title of his recent book about his experiences
Metrosexual – measurement of length in genital units
Anus envy – emotion felt by Barbie fancier on regarding Ken
Bed blocker – cheerleader’s ambition
Bridezilla – TV programme anchored by Zilla Black. Starts where Blind Date leaves off
Big hair house – any Dynasty mansion with doors big enough to take power shoulders
Bozo explosion – almost the beginning of the dog doo da band
Trustafarian – anyone who does things in a backassward fashion
