(with apologies 'cause it looks like this thread's heading for the gutter)

'doesn't know his arse from his elbow'
'he's got it all arse about tit'

(moving back out of the gutter)
'that one definitely wasn't at the front of the queue' (when they were handing out looks/height/brains/whatever)

'not got all her marbles' or 'she's lost her marbles'

there's loads more, but I've gone temporarily brain dead - need sleeeeep! Until tomorrow!