The Surrealist Alphabet: one of my dad's 78 that he laughed uproariously to. I can't remember exactly what they said on the record (or who they were: Jack Hulton?). Possible variations:

C forth Highlanders.
E for Adam.
H for... no I can never remember this either. H for consent? No, too racy.
N for a penny.
Q for billiards.
S for Williams.
U for... for mism? for ne?
V for la France (at which point the two performers broke into a hearty "Allons enfants de la patrie").