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Carpal Tunnel
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and your tolerance, please, all.
A friend has just died from cancer. Though 'expected' for some time, it's still hard to bear.
Kate was in her thirties. Her son is 10.
I have been asked to read the address next Monday at the funeral. Can anyone help with a few favourite words?
Thank you. If you can click on this message for any reply, it will be emailed to me even if I cannot get to the board much.
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Oh, Sweetie, I am sorry. Golly. I'm just going to list whatever I think of; no order.
understanding; clever; funny; beloved; loving; unique; will be missed; scholarly; inner beauty; blithe spirit; joyful; caring; sense of duty; fulfilled; courageous; magnanimous; generous; kind; centered; earthy; spiritual; laughing; everyone will miss her smile; giving of herself; she treasured ____; she was treasured; {son's name), do your best to act according to how she taught you; organized; a hard worker; always did the best she could; enthusiastic; threw herself into things; full of light; selfless; no one could ____ like she could; graced all who knew her.
Sweet maverick, if I think of any more, I'll let you know, and will be thinking of you on Monday.
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enthusiast
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I sympathize with you, maverick. Honoring your friend will be easy because her many fine qualities that drew you to her will provide ample words for praise but to console the 10-year old son will be a daunting task. It is to him that much thought should be given. I am sorry that I cannot help but I have great confidence that your great desire to comfort this grieving son will help you find the words you will need.
chronist
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Now I see that Jackie has given you an arsenal of words to help you out. And fine words they are. Dear maverick, you will do just fine.
chronist
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old hand
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old hand
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Dear Mav The best words will be the words true to your feelings. Just be guided by your feelings and the simplest word will sound good.
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Anonymous
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Anonymous
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oh, Mav, i am so sorry to hear this news.
the one thing i always think of in these situations is the phrase 'touched so many lives'. in this case, so many of your friends lovely attributes are doubtlessly impressed upon and carried on by her son (*sigh*), so perhaps comment could be made on the good fortune that--quite literally--a part of her lives on, in her child.
i found this online (forgive the length) and parts of it i found quite moving:
How do you eulogize your hero, other than to say Richie is the greatest man I've ever known?
It is more than obvious that we are all experiencing a devastating loss--but you know who I feel for as much as anyone in this room? The people that will never be touched by Rich the way we all have been. He elevated us as human beings. And we are all fortunate for that.
A man for others and often of few words, Richie always loved seeing other people do well...
...Richie had an unconditional acceptance in the form of respect for everyone he met. He always tapped into the goodness and always made you feel special...
...There was never a wasted day in Rich's life. No such thing as a day off. Today, we must bury Rich, but never forget him.
So work a little harder, spend more quality time with your families...and DON'T waste another minute, they are all precious.
In a way, this is a call to arms; for hugging and support. From this moment onward, Rosi and Baby will need all the arms we can give them.
How can you eulogize your hero? Richie is the greatest man I've ever known.
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Thanks to all. In particular I am wondering if anyone can think of a favourite short poem or other quotation that might suggest itself?
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addict
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addict
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Maverick, my thoughts are with you and her son. As for poems, I was moved by several in the Sonnets and Memorial Day threads. I find my own posting of "The life that I have" particularly moving, but you may want something less emotional. Did the friend have a favourite author you could choose from? I hope the son finds some strength from your friendship. Rod
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enthusiast
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....I am wondering if anyone can think of a favourite short poem or other quotation that might suggest itself?
Wordsworth's "She Was A Phantom of Delight" comes to mind. The last 10 lines are worth looking at.
chronist
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CHRISTINA ROSSETTI (1830-1894) DREAM LAND
1 Where sunless rivers weep 2 Their waves into the deep, 3 She sleeps a charmed sleep: 4 Awake her not. 5 Led by a single star, 6 She came from very far 7 To seek where shadows are 8 Her pleasant lot.
9 She left the rosy morn, 10 She left the fields of corn, 11 For twilight cold and lorn 12 And water springs. 13 Through sleep, as through a veil, 14 She sees the sky look pale, 15 And hears the nightingale 16 That sadly sings.
17 Rest, rest, a perfect rest 18 Shed over brow and breast; 19 Her face is toward the west, 20 The purple land. 21 She cannot see the grain 22 Ripening on hill and plain; 23 She cannot feel the rain 24 Upon her hand.
25 Rest, rest, for evermore 26 Upon a mossy shore; 27 Rest, rest at the heart's core 28 Till time shall cease: 29 Sleep that no pain shall wake; 30 Night that no morn shall break 31 Till joy shall overtake 32 Her perfect peace. ===========================================================
William Yeats Where my books go All the words that I utter, And all the words that I write, Must spread out their wings untiring, And never rest in their flight, Till they come where your sad, sad heart is, And sing to you in the night, Beyond where the waters are moving, Storm-darken'd or starry bright. ==========================================================
Christina Rossetti Remember REMEMBER me when I am gone away, Gone far away into the silent land; When you can no more hold me by the hand, Nor I half turn to go, yet turning stay. Remember me when no more day by day You tell me of our future that you plann'd: Only remember me; you understand It will be late to counsel then or pray. Yet if you should forget me for a while And afterwards remember, do not grieve: For if the darkness and corruption leave A vestige of the thoughts that once I had, Better by far you should forget and smile Than that you should remember and be sad. =========================================================== I doubt you will want this one, but I'm putting it because it is awful and beautiful.
Rupert Brooke
Dust
When the white flame in us is gone, And we that lost the world's delight Stiffen in darkness, left alone To crumble in our separate night;
When your swift hair is quiet in death, And through the lips corruption thrust Has stilled the labour of my breath -- When we are dust, when we are dust! --
Not dead, not undesirous yet, Still sentient, still unsatisfied, We'll ride the air, and shine, and flit, Around the places where we died,
And dance as dust before the sun, And light of foot, and unconfined, Hurry from road to road, and run About the errands of the wind.
And every mote, on earth or air, Will speed and gleam, down later days, And like a secret pilgrim fare By eager and invisible ways,
Nor ever rest, nor ever lie, Till, beyond thinking, out of view, One mote of all the dust that's I Shall meet one atom that was you.
Then in some garden hushed from wind, Warm in a sunset's afterglow, The lovers in the flowers will find A sweet and strange unquiet grow
Upon the peace; and, past desiring, So high a beauty in the air, And such a light, and such a quiring, And such a radiant ecstasy there,
They'll know not if it's fire, or dew, Or out of earth, or in the height, Singing, or flame, or scent, or hue, Or two that pass, in light, to light,
Out of the garden, higher, higher. . . . But in that instant they shall learn The shattering ecstasy of our fire, And the weak passionless hearts will burn
And faint in that amazing glow, Until the darkness close above; And they will know -- poor fools, they'll know! -- One moment, what it is to love.
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