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Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Jan 2001
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Do most women and men really speak different languages? Here is an excerpt from a website entitled, Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About: See if you can spot the difference between these two statements: (a) "Those trousers make your backside look fat." (b) "You're a repellently obese old hag upon whom I am compelled to heap insults and derision - depressingly far removed from the 'stupid, squeaky, pocket-sized English women' who make up my vast catalogue of former lovers and to whom I might as well return right now as I hate everything about you." Maybe the acoustics were really bad in the dining room, or something.For more, go to http://homepage.ntlworld.com/mil.millington/things.html
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old hand
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old hand
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I'm not quite done reading the page but I'd better send it to my husband!  The TV remote thing struck me. There is a basket on the shelf, meant for the TV guide and the instruction book for the VCR and the TV remote. I have not once found the remote there unless I put it there myself, after finding it in some weird place while straightening the room. ARGH! It often gets very close to the basket, but never quite into it. WHY?????
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addict
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addict
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Oh Sparteye, that is sooo funny, and I recognised my wife immediately . Rod
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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I found myself nearly helpless with laughter a couple of times. In another thread, I said I don't like reading things which don't take me out of myself, but this one was so firmly me that I read the whole thing once and then bits of it again - just to reassure myself that someone really did have a secret video recording unit in our house. And if I ever lay my hands on Mil Millington, I'm going to sue his socks off for stealing all those bits of my life! 
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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I couldn't read the whole thang. I *did print it out and will read it at home. I'd sure like to see Margaret's version. Or did I miss a link somewhere?
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enthusiast
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enthusiast
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Sparteye>>>
Do most women and men really speak different languages?
Here is an excerpt from a website entitled, Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About:
Sparteye, You have heard the saying "misery loves company", this will be great therapy for all those looking for a perfect relationship and not finding it.
chronist
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old hand
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old hand
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I can't compete with Millington's wry observations, but I've noticed that when men say that they're looking for a girlfriend (No, not a mislaid present one, a new one) they say, "I want to meet some new women." When women say the same thing, they ALWAYS say, "I want to meet some new people." This, as far as I know, is the only circumstance wherein women admit that men are people. Is this correct according to others' observations, or am I really strange?
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Geoff remarks on the only circumstance wherein women admit that men are people.
Or, to put it another way; if a man says something in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Thanks, Sparteye – laughed like a drain at finding this again! I quite liked some of Mil’s apologies too – here’s one for you CK: “I would like to apologise: to the world for New Zealand being called a country when really, it is simply a refuelling station for aeroplanes, whispers a bowed Hayden Skudder, wringing his hands. Let me make it clear that I have nothing against New Zealand, I'm just surprised I get so many hits from there. Surely it's only home to about two dozen people. Perhaps half of whom have access to electricity. Where are all the hits coming from?” ..and some of the loo stories are very funny!
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Thanks, sparteye - I have saved that page to show my wife. I even found the apolgy for NZ funny. 
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Mav came up with: I quite liked some of Mil’s apologies too – here’s one for you CK:
“I would like to apologise: to the world for New Zealand being called a country when really, it is simply a refuelling station for aeroplanes, whispers a bowed Hayden Skudder, wringing his hands. Let me make it clear that I have nothing against New Zealand, I'm just surprised I get so many hits from there. Surely it's only home to about two dozen people. Perhaps half of whom have access to electricity. Where are all the hits coming from?”I can forgive ignorance without malice. The one thing that my wife and I do agree on is that in emigrating we are going from civilisation to something rather less ... at least there are farm animals not buried where we are!
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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farm animals not buried where we are! Yeah, they've had this catch-up problem in England, too CK! So come to Wales where scarcely any impact has been felt, where the fields around my house are lush green and grazed by lambs and cows and horses, where a badger came snuzzling round my door a couple of days ago and where a buzzard perches on a fencepost in our lane. It's OK - there's no need for a special passport, though there quite rightly is a road toll to come over the bridge into Wales (but not to get back to the grimness of Lloegr) But what always makes me really chuckle about stuff like that is the incredible narrow-minded parochialism that bounds the views of so many inhabitants of this shrinking globe. It's no coincidence, I think, that in reality two such witty and worldly contributors to this forum should be hailing from Zild, yet the 'image' is still 'rural backwater stuck in a 50s timeshift' if such caricatures are anything to go by. Ah, well - the same caricatures apply to us all (and the sheep are liars!)
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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rural backwater stuck in a 50s timeshift
It's the 50s already? Damn, it seems like the war ended just yesterday.
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