The Troll's Bane Song
(Don't Feed The Troll)

~Author Unknown

[Enter a group of Bards that surround the Stupid Troll, then singing in close harmony, do-wop style, snapping fingers and acting silly, keep the Troll distracted until it's too late!]

Don't feed the troll !
You don't know where it's been be-fore;
It might not be ... sanitary, so
Don't feed the troll !

Please don't feed the troll !
They're very unpredictable, you know.
You might just lose a finger, so
Don't feed the troll !

Don't argue with a troll,
Because..
It does no good at all.
(hummm.... do-wah..)
They have very little sense;
All they can do
Is drive.. you.. up.. the wall...

So, don't feed the troll;
Those nasty suckers have a lot of germs.
Don't feed the troll...
Unless you have a pocketful of worms.... (eeuw!)

Oh, don't feed the troll !
Because you'd have to stoop way too low!
Keep a hand on your knife,
And an eye to your back,
But just let the vermin go. (Oooh -- do-wah!)

[Exit the Bards, leaving a puddle of gooey troll, since we all know that a Troll's Achilles Heel is anything sung do-wop style. Silly Trolls never seem to learn, do they!]