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#29059 05/13/01 11:39 PM
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From a cartoon in Harper's Magazine a few years ago:




"Dragnet" Haiku

Eleven-fifty-seven P.M.
The white chrysanthemum






#29060 05/14/01 02:03 AM
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Thanks, Alex. Nice to see you back.

P.S.--Got anything for "Car 54, Where Are You?"


#29061 05/14/01 06:58 AM
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I'm afraid you've lost me. Is that a really a haiku? Please explain...

Sara x


#29062 05/14/01 02:16 PM
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as far as i know,
haiku have 3 lines of
5 syllables
7 syllables and
5 syllables.
there should also be a word to indicate the season.
if you translated the "white chrysanthemum" as
"shiroi kiku" it would be the final 5 syllables.
the first part could have many ways to be translated.
the question is, is this an english or japanese haiku?
let me try and find out if it's a well known haiku here.

there is also a haiku in english trend. i don't know much about this.



#29063 05/14/01 03:24 PM
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a few year ago-- as times square was in the process of being cleaned up--many of the old theaters (which had become movie theaters for XXX rated shows) where closed-- until they where renovated-- the marques had "urban haiku's" (there were several contest to submit haiku's) the one i remember was:

With a florish,
the waitress rearranges the
smears on the table.



#29064 05/14/01 05:25 PM
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The white chrysanthemum

Shouldn't that be, "The black dahlia"? Or am I splitting hers?*


*[eeewwww emoticon]








#29065 05/15/01 03:58 AM
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The white chrysanthemum

Shouldn't that be, "The black dahlia"? Or am I splitting hers?


Is this a morbid reference to the story, The Odor of Chrysanthemums, i.e. masking the smell of death?

Jackie wants Car 54 Where Are You; I want Police Squad.


#29066 05/16/01 03:36 PM
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Just the facts, re: "Is it really a haiku?" Well, it's actually a joke, and therefore exempt from strict rules of ... haikuity, I guess. You have to imagine Jack Webb's voice as Sgt. Friday as he speaks in that deadpan cop's voice: "Eleven fifty-seven PM..." -- it begins like a description of a stake out or something, but then it ends with an enigmatic reference to a flower, inducing a chuckle.



#29067 05/17/01 11:16 AM
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"Tell us what happened."
"The moon looking like a crane..."
"Just want the facts, ma'am."


#29068 05/17/01 11:28 AM
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Warriors clashing
Khrushchev due in eastern sky
They seek the rickshaw



#29069 05/18/01 06:05 PM
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One Adam Twelve call
See the drunk man with a knife
Hot summer night rage


#29070 05/19/01 04:44 AM
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Body in dumpster,
bloody; cop throws in corner.
Belker, all is forgiven.



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#29071 05/19/01 12:23 PM
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Belker, all is forgiven.
Oh, I loved Hill Street Blues!! [beaming smile]
That is the only show in my adult life that pulled me into it so far that it seemed real. Daniel J. Travanti: swoon!
Veronica Hamel: drop-dead gorgeous.
"And, hey--let's be careful out there".



#29072 05/19/01 07:59 PM
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Long Springtime evenings,
Lovers meeting at twilight,
Stars wink, moon smiles.

My first haiku. Does it scan?
Or have I missed the point (again)? Must it be Dragnet connected ?



#29073 05/20/01 01:03 AM
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Japanese haiku have the form 5 - 7 - 5 syllables. The cunning so-and-so's get away with packing a lot of meaning into their haikus because they don't have lots of inconvenient linguistic crutches such as articles, prepositions, particles and the like to deal with (and I understand they omit them when they're inconvenient, e.g. ga and no get dropped, but perhaps a Japanese speaker can elucidate here).

We tend to say "it should be seventeen syllables in three lines" and leave it at that. Some say it should be three short lines, with the second line longer than the others. Others say that the line break should occur at a natural break in the meaning. I remember reading that the best haiku have two unrelated statements in the first two sections (the 5 - 7) and that the two first statements are tied together in the third (5).

As I understand it, the three lines is a convenience, not a requirement, but I could be wrong.

NicholasW's contribution above has the correct Japanese 5 -7 - 5 formation and he's used three lines. Mine doesn't scan, but has three lines .

I only know about this stuff at all because a colleague in another life started a haiku-writing competition in the department I was working in at morning tea one day. When all the response she received was a set of completely blank looks, she gave us a short lesson ... before you knew it, we were reading everything on the subject we could lay our hands on in an effort to outdo each other in obscureness and purity of formation. As a craze, it lasted about six weeks!

I googled this link which isn't bad:

http://www.ahapoetry.com/haidefjr.htm





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#29074 05/20/01 01:53 AM
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Cpt. Kiwi:

My college roommate and I came up with this haiku about 10 years ago:

Generic Haiku

Five syllables here
Something about the seasons
This line is real deep


#29075 05/20/01 04:13 AM
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Alex,

P-r-e-e-cisely!



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#29076 05/20/01 12:49 PM
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Alex,

That was quite inspired! And even though I'm sure y'all didn't intend it as such, it's a great mnemonic for teaching the haiku form. Thanks.


#29077 05/21/01 08:43 AM
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The generic haiku is great. I still like Stephen Fry's


To make a poem
With seventeen syllables
Is very diffic

Rod


#29078 05/21/01 03:14 PM
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Stephen Fry's:
To make a poem
With seventeen syllables
Is very diffic


Oh! Oh! Oh! My feeling exactly.
Thanks for a Monday chuckle, Rod!


#29079 05/21/01 06:21 PM
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What a surprise and a pleasure to find that the generic haiku is useful as well as ornamental. Stephen Fry's is funny too. Is that the same person who plays "Jeeves" on the British television show, or is that Stephen Frey? Anyway, Jeeves is hilarious. Sadly, I am more like Bertie Wooster myself. Credit for the "generic haiku" should be shared with one James Evans, now of Seattle, WA.




#29080 05/21/01 07:24 PM
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. Is that the same person who plays "Jeeves" on the British television show,


The same, and together with Hugh Laurie as Wooster, it was one of the most inspired pieces of casting I have ever seen on television, IMHO.


#29081 05/21/01 07:37 PM
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>Hugh Laurie as Wooster

and, speaking of connections, wasn't Laurie one of Black Adder's main foils?


#29082 05/22/01 04:39 AM
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speaking of connections, wasn't Laurie one of Black Adder's main foils?
[b/lue]

Yes he was, as was Fry. Fry had a recurring character as Lord/General Melchett, and Laurie was very good as the dimwitted Prince Regent in sereis 3 and Blackadder's leftenant in series 4.


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