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#209158 - 01/19/13 02:58 AM Re: Sparteye's Game, only it should load faster now [Re: Avy]
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 7,496 wofahulicodoc
Carpal Tunnel
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 7,496
Worcester, MA
First the Lost Dutchman's Goldmine attacked us, *
Then excessively watered the cactus. **
...Now I find with dismay
...That an Apple a day
Keeps the Doctor away from his practice ! ***
* One of the early text-only adventure games. Like Zork.
** If you did anything but the right thing all you saw was a saguaro cactus
*** Remember when there were no Macintosh computers, just an Apple II ?
(I won $10 once for submitting that to an early computer magazine, in 1983 or so. That's the same as Second Prize in a Beauty Contest !)
#209175 - 01/20/13 03:28 AM Re: Sparteye's Game, only it should load faster now [Re: maverick]
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,554 jenny jenny
veteran
veteran
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,554
Lower Aberdeen, Mississippi
In transept cathedrals the heathens did worsh
Building their churches crossed shaped
As vehicles where souls could translate
Now every airplane flying is a cross shaped church
GNOSIS - GOAT
#209176 - 01/20/13 03:39 AM Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757 maverick
Carpal Tunnel
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757
Hm, yes, it can be – but the form is not exactly set in concrete.
Personally, the structure I think most satisfying is:
Rhyme scheme: AABBA
Lines 1,2,5: 9 syllables in 3 amphibrachic feet
Lines 3,4: 6 syllables in 2 anapestic feet
The unity of triploid feet helps weld the thing together, but the variation in stress patterns makes for more interest. This gives the characteristic declamatory inversion of normal speech rhythm in the first line ~ “There WAS an/old MAN of/deVIZes….” The alteration to anapaest in the middle couplet has something of the same kind of effect that a couplet does in a 14 line sonnet, but sprung into the humorous conclusion of the final line with both rhythmic stress and final rhyme striking conclusively as a closing bell (apart from variation for more humorous effect!)
ymmv
and now we return you to your regular program...
#209177 - 01/20/13 04:02 AM Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757 maverick
Carpal Tunnel
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757
Whose long-growing gnosis was tricky:
He had discarded god
As a vindictive sod
But a goat’s love soon gained him a quickie!
now an easy lob:
GIRDLE - - - GIRL
#209178 - 01/20/13 04:16 AM Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 Jackie
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Louisville, Kentucky
Who ran track and was facing a hurdle;
She ran and she jumped
but down she did thump,
being stopped at mid-leap by her girdle.
Somebody else please post new words for me--I can't get to my brick-and-mortar dictionary right now. Thanks.
#209179 - 01/20/13 05:16 AM Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 10,538 tsuwm
Carpal Tunnel
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 10,538
this too shall pass
GHOSTLIKE GIBBET
#209180 - 01/20/13 08:23 AM Joined: May 2010
Posts: 958 Tromboniator
old hand
old hand
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 958
Alaska
A bit late to be urbane and glib, it
Was then his thirst spike
Caused the thought, so ghostlike:
"I could sure use a shot of Glenlibet."
CONFIDENTIAL – CONGO
#209181 - 01/20/13 12:35 PM Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 909 A C Bowden
old hand
old hand
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 909
London, UK
The President wrote "It's essential
That the Congo's unrest
Should be quickly suppressed,
Or its spread could become exponential".
ENORMOUS – ENTANGLE
#209188 - 01/21/13 01:18 PM Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757 maverick
Carpal Tunnel
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,757
and isn't it interesting how the very constraints of form (and content) can light a spark of creativity?
#209189 - 01/21/13 05:06 PM Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 8,975 LukeJavan8
Carpal Tunnel
Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 8,975
Land of the Flat Water
----please, draw me a sheep----
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