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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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newbie
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newbie
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i'd be offended
For me the offensiveness of that term depending on the situation. In business or faith related arenas it's very bad, but in bars it has to be tolerated. I have a girlfriend who uses it all the time I have to be very careful of my speech for days after time spent with her, she's a bank vice president even being at work doesn't stop her. On the other hand I've seen the most foul mouth of the customers of the one places I drink in self edit because my mom or other senior ladies were there. Not so for the Dad's.
CJ
CJ
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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If you want a choice example from today, ask me privately! I wouldn't repeat it on the board ... 
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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This round's on me. The next one too!
TEd
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Posts: 76
journeyman
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journeyman
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When I really thought about it for the first time, I realized that using "fuck you" as an insult is actually very misogynistic -- equating being on the receiving end of intercourse as being inferior. So I've tried to quit using it that way. Fucking is too much fun to turn into a power struggle!
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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"Although I've probably mentioned it before, you have to realise that women's lib got taken very seriously here in Zild and with a few exceptions on that malleable list of general demands which libbers failed to burn along with their bras, has succeeded. That includes, apparently, the right to say exactly what they want to say and to say it exactly how they want to say it!"
I do not regard female free use of the "f... word" as progress. I guess I am so used to girls behaving better than us boys, that I don't enjoy their uncritical use of new found freedom. They may well be more comfortable being down from the pedestal they were formerly expected to occupy, but the base of the pedestal was not in the gutter.
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146 |
I do not regard female free use of the "f... word" as progress. I guess I am so used to girls behaving better than us boys, that I don't enjoy their uncritical use of new found freedom. They may well be more comfortable being down from the pedestal they were formerly expected to occupy, but the base of the pedestal was not in the gutter.Sorry Bill, it's far too late to do anything except to lie back and think of England ... + [Diving-for-cover-from Jackie emoticon]
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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C.K., I'm finally getting around to a more thought-out reply. You clearly recognize and accept that women are in
fact equally capable, and just as deserving of rewards for their efforts. This is one of the many reasons I admire you.
Your comment on the generations reminded me of a statement that I can only paraphrase, having not only forgotten the exact words, but the source, whom I think is a black female:
Wearing heels, I stride through doors that were pushed open by my grandmother crawling barefoot. (The ref. to high-heeled shoes being to something that only high-level-job people wear.)
You said that women in NZ say what they want to , however they want to, and do things like announce that they have gone to bars looking for one-night stands. I believe I picked up a hint that you disapprove of this, and I also have the feeling that you disapprove of men doing this. (If I am wrong, feel free to correct me.) But based on that
belief, I will add that I agree that there is a time and a
place for crude language and behavior, and that most group settings, including work, is not one of them. In my opinion, this demonstrates one or more of the following:
the speaker doesn't know any better, which is really sad;
is demonstrating a lack of consideration for others, as though they are thinking, "My words offend you? Too bad for you, sucker!"; the speaker believes/hopes this usage will demonstrate the allegation that they are something they really aren't--similar to the effect young teens are trying to give by smoking.
There is nothing derogatory in demonstrating that one has been taught good manners, and uses them. Good manners most
definitely involves consideration of others. If someone is
constantly flaunting their lack of good manners, this says
a great deal about them, and all around them know it--unless they are with people of like mind, in which case it
doesn't matter as much.
I have no problem with myself or others hearing and using
uncouth language to people who know us well--that is, those whom we know who will not be offended. But I am of the
irrevocable opinion that there are certain things that should, quite simply, be kept private.
Going down a side path for a moment: each of has different things that offend us. I have my own, unjustified set of things I take offense at: d-mn and h-ll don't bother me,
but I was raised that the b--t word for one's backside was a bad word, so I don't use that--I think it slipped out one
time; and I absolutely, never, ever, use that a-- word---I
can't abide it, I just can't. And while I'm ranting, I really don't care to know what kind of undergarments people wear, and I most especially do not want to know what kind of private activities people consider "fun".
This, I think, emphasizes all the more my earlier point about how important it is to have consideration for others,
and that if someone perseveres with behavior that they know offends someone, this tells a great deal about what they are like.
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Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Jan 2001
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In reply to:
I will add that I agree that there is a time and a
place for crude language and behavior, and that most group settings, including work, is not one of them. In my opinion, this demonstrates one or more of the following:
the speaker doesn't know any better, which is really sad;
is demonstrating a lack of consideration for others, as though they are thinking, "My words offend you? Too bad for you, sucker!"
Jackie, you have hit squarely upon it. A study of the use of vulgar language (I forget where I read it, but it was within the past year or two) in the US showed an inverted bell curve, when frequency of the language was plotted against the socio-economic-educational background of the speaker. Briefly, the higher or lower the station of the speaker, the more vulgar the language. Why? I think you have answered it - the lower-educated and employed neither know of the inappropriateness of the behavior, nor have anything to risk by its use, while the higher-stationed speaker knows he may spew bile with impunity, and does so to confirm his authority (like my former boss). I have observed in my own life that both handwriting deterioration and the use of vulgarity seem to directly correlate with years spent in higher education.
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Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,981 |
>US showed an inverted bell curve, when frequency of the language was plotted against the socio-economic-educational background of the speaker. Briefly, the higher or lower the station of the speaker, the more vulgar the language.
I'd agree with this. I had a wide range of friends whilst at university and noticed that the "upper classes" swore like troopers and had no problem with "personal habits" that would be regarded with horror outside their social circle. That which was allowed "Upstairs" would not be countenanced "Downstairs".
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