There was an article in our paper the other day about a young lady who felt so strongly about cruelty to animals that she legally changed her name to something like 'GoVeg.com'--the address of her favorite organization's website.
What do you all think about name changes? To me, my name is a deeply-ingrained part of my identity. I did consider at one time trying to get people to call me by my full first name because I have never liked Jackie, but decided it wouldn't be worth the trouble. I don't know--I just can't imagine thinking of myself as "me", if I changed my name to, oh, Calliope or Darlene. Has anyone here ever changed their name? (In real life, I mean.)
i have been considering changing my name for years.
i doubt i will do it--but i do think about it.
i don't mind helen (or my passel of middle names, all unused)
but i 'changed my name' when i married and didn't really want to change it back when i divorced, but i don't really like my current last name or my maiden last name.
I have a friend who did change his name, but he refused to talk about why.. and how its worked for him. (from dike to pike--only a one letter change!)
i think if i did change my name, it would be to Lee-- a family name (but not my mother's or fathers) and a bit ambiguous--. It could be Chinese--(but Robt. E Lee wasn't!) it could be american (see Robt. E Lee) but my relative named Lee wasn't. another family name i could use is Lamb. (no family relation to the writer) but well, 'lamb'? its sound like the answer to 'what's for dinner?'!--all the other family names are very ethnicly irish names. --Lee and Lamb are a bit more, well, neutral.
i don't really like my current last name
What's wrong with Ledasdottir?
Well, if you've ever seen Michaelangelo's
Statue of David, I'm proud to say my name does me justice.
One of my old school friends, Thelma, changed her name on the occasion of her 40th birthday...to signify a new beginning. Her name is Eve!
I have a friend who posts here as sjmaxq, and he tells me that some people still call him Max even when they know his real name. Is he "Max" or is he the other one? Or is there a 3rd possibility?
In India there is a (superstitious?) practice called Numerology, where people add the letters of their names and come up with a number. This number could be lucky or not. If it is an unlucky number, they add a letter to their names and change the number to change their luck. So you have spellings like Vijjay for Vijay or Shobhaa for Shobha.
I am not saying it does not work, but I don't believe in it.
Also in India in some communities a woman changes even her first name after marriage.
It is kind of freeing to have whole new name … a whole new start. Though, I doubt it makes you a different person. Perhaps it makes you want to make less mistakes.
> It is kind of freeing to have whole new name … a whole new start. Though, I doubt it makes you a different person. Perhaps it makes you want to make less mistakes. [e.a.]
Nice thought, Avy - doesn't seem to work on this board for those who have changed their name (but not their nature) with mind-numbingly tedious frequency. It seems to confirm the middle part of your surmise, though!
Jackie ! Intriguing. Are you really Jacqueline?
I have read that in some Native American tribes a male is given a name at birth which becomes his "child name" and when he becomes an adult - usually after a ceremony - he gets a new name which he is known by the rest of his adult life, perhaps the only exception being his mother's usuing his child name - in affection.
Then there is the whole nickname aspect of Jacqueline's query.
I had a boss whose name was Robert but he was known to all as Buzz. It suited him better than Bob or Rob or any variation of Robert.
Anyone care to add a comment/experienc?
i insisted that people call my children by their full names.(benjamin and emily)
many people wanted to shorten Benjamin to benji or to benny. Now as an adult, my son most often goes by Benjamin, but some friends know him as ben. Its so much easier to make Benjamin into Ben. Once a childhood nickname is established, its very hard to change to the full name.
(my son has also taken to using his middle name--a name he disliked as child--as his cyber name.)
my family is filled with confusion because of names..
(there is Elizabeth, who was nick named annabel until WWII--when she picked up the name of "pidge' (short for pidgeon, her last name)--or my own mother -christened Nora Veronica, she is generally known to one and all as Vera--
and then there are the 'common names' that re-appear (call out Billy at a family reunion and up to 5 people could respond!)ditto for Jim/jimmy, or Tom/tommy or Dennis/dinny.
(i am a oner-what a surprize!--as are most of my siblings (my parents intentional effort)the only helen.)
(my sister geraldine 'shares her name' with a cousin-in-law)
Call me closed-minded if you want to but anyone who changes their name to anything-dot-com is a bona fide weirdo.
call my children by their full names
I'm with you, Helen. I always called my son David as opposed to Dave - of course many people do call him Dave, including me occasionally. My other son is Paul and that's pretty hard to shorten, although for a time he was PK to his friends. My mother-in-law was a great one for tacking on the diminutive "ey" (or "ie"). So the grandchildren were Paulie, Davey, Nicoley (I kid you not), and Bricey. The two who escaped were Kristen and Shannon. In general, I prefer using full names as opposed to nicknames.
Well, if you've ever seen Michaelangelo's Statue of David, I'm proud to say my name does me justice. ~ Juan
I'm married to one!
I'm married to one!Yes...and I've heard there are others...
(Davids on the board, I mean)
DaveyCouldn't complain about David, always liked it. But I do like David, not Dave, and especially not Davey. Most of my relatives and friends wind-up calling me Dave after awhile, even after I make the first gratutitous request for them not to. But
NEVER Davey! I *hate it!
(yeah, I had my Davey Crockett hat when I was a kid, but...)
> Paul and that's pretty hard to shorten, although for a time he was PK to his friends
Strange, isn't it? ~ they 'shorten' a single syllable to two!
anyone who changes their name to anything-dot-com is a bona fide weirdo. Alex, I was wondering if anybody else agreed with me on that!
Yes, it does sound a little strange to shorten a one-syllable name to two, but in earlier times, at least in some places, people were known as having "long names" and "short names", so in that sense it fits. Now that I'm thinking about it, I've not heard those terms in a number of years. Now, what I hear is "full name" and "nickname".
Mm--I agree, on the baby-fying of names, esp. guys' names; for some reason, they seem to be given a harder time by their peers if they don't manage to get rid of it early enough. Although I know 3 guys whom I try to make sure I always call Ron; one is a few years younger than I, and the other 2 are older; and all 3 are called Ronnie at least by their wives, and they don't seem to mind. Benny? Wasn't he one of the bad guys in Sister Act?
Oh--am I really Jacqueline? Not quite; check my e-mail header, wow.
My middle name was my mother's maiden name - a fact of which I have always been proud. After she died, I tried to get folks to call me by it - never worked. I should have used it as my username - too late now, I hated being strange.
I also know of a man who worked in our ED who was an orphen - married an only-child woman. He decided to take her surname rather than the reverse (our standard) - something we all though terribly romantic. Unfortunately the marriage lasted barely a year. He still, to the best of my knowledge, carries her name!
Why not?
they 'shorten' a single syllable to two!
I suppose, if you count length by syllables. Run a sonogram on the two varieties and see which takes longer to say. I wouldn't be surprised to find "paul" longer than "peekay"
Like every Tom, Dick & Harry around here has access to sonography?
> wouldn't be surprised to find "paul" longer than "peekay
I would, but do let me know when you've tried it Fong - my sonograph's got a flat battery!
> wouldn't be surprised to find "paul" longer than "peekay
'specially if you let Jackie say it...
hell, yea~uh, I was assuming it had only one syllable but!
Paul is pronounced PAW-awl...
Sure. We are our names, and our names are us, and are the only enduring things we have. All that is left after death is the name only. They will outlast us in records after we have gone for many many years. Our names, in fact, are our most precious personal things. They should be used with care and consideration. How I wish that telemarketers would respect them. How's about we start to use honorifics again when we address complete strangers?
welcome, Mr. er, Ms., um, Buderim.
> All that is left after death is the name only.
not necessarily. there could be works of art, or an invention, or cure, or...?
Wow, this is a fascinating thread!
I have always gone by Elizabeth, except for two years when my brother David was very small. He called me "Betty", and the rest of the family did, too, until he learned to say "Elizabeth". Nobody else called me "Betty". I like my full name. My husband, also a David, gets "Dave" from a lot of people, sometimes even his family, but I always call him David. Another David I know told me he liked that I didn't call him "Dave" like everyone else.
For several years I was known by a totally different name to a lot of my friends. I was part of the Society for Creative Anachronism, a mediaeval recreationist group. Part of that is to create a mediaeval persona for yourself, with a different name from your "mundane" one. Mine was Searu, adapted from the OE word for "skill, craft or cunning". There are people to this day who do not know my given name. The boyfriend I had at the time (yet another David, is there no end to them!!??) never called me Elizabeth, and did not permit me to call him David. We used only our SCA names. (We notice that this relationship is long, long over!)
In my religion people frequently use names which are different from their given ones. There are, again, people who don't actually know my given name, but who know me by my other name.
As for our names being all that is left, I think it has actually been quite the opposite for most people. Even people who have left works of art have not always left their names - the Housebook Master, the Master ES, the Master of Mary of Burgundy (named for a book of hours he - or she - illuminated) and many, many more recorded simply as "Anonymous".
I changed my name the first time I got married, and Elizabeth Creith disappeared. This Mrs. Daniel Zlatin chick was everywhere. I felt invisible. I changed back. I never, ever called myself by my husband's first name (Daniel is an odd name for a woman) but everybody else seemed to think that's what I should be/wanted to be called.
Thank you for the greetings and comments. My words were ill-chosen for I was trying to say that the name is the longest-lasting personal thing each of us have. Of course that is quite different from saying that all that is left after death is the name only. Sorry.
Buderim (M)
well, will you be surprised to hear the only zest which drove me to change my name was...'i love cats' !
I believe a name should describe our true identity, and should hold ideocyncrasy unique to the individual in question. My previous name was just another common hindu name with age old family name, which i found 'unattractive and reflect conservative Hindu'. I worship ancient Egyptian goddess of cats, Bast (that is my new sir name. Scientific name of domestic cat: "Felis" domesticus and "Felix" the cat motivated me to chose the first name: Felix!
-Felix Bast
Buderim, no apologies necessary, especially around here! we're all about words. in whatever order or idea.
well, mostly...and welcome Felix! great to have another cat-lover around.
in whatever order or idea
Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.
Welcome aBoard, Felix, and thanks for the info. Tell me, if you don't mind--do you realize immediately that if someone behind you calls out "Felix", they mean you? About how long did that take, to become natural for you? Is there anyone who still calls you by your former name, and do you still respond as easily to that?
I have to say, the idea of a whole new start is appealing. But I don't think I could ever stop thinking of (say I chose) Eve as me: I think I'd be thinking, "Who is this person?" Though perhaps age has something to do with it; perhaps I'd have had an easier time thinking of doing it in my 20's, whereas now I've been Jackie for five decades.
In reply to:
Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.
Huh?
> Huh?
Her point I think that is!
I would have used
coffee, should, book, garbage quickly...
I never book my garbage coffee quickly (or shouldn't) and my colorless green ideas don't sleep, so obviously I got confused.
Got it! Thanks again...
Rm
I like my name so I can't imagine changing it, but I do shorten it to Gin for my English friends.
That said, say you want to crash an embassy party or some such, being able to be comfortable with an assumed name could be quite useful.
I'm just saying.
>That said, say you want to crash an embassy party or some such, being able to be comfortable with an assumed name could be quite useful.
Yes, I can see that having a long-established alias might be useful.