The Microsoft Linguistic Orthodoxy

I got thinking about this little pet hate of mine whilst reading through the spell-checker debate in this forum.

Does anyone else get frsutrated by Word '97's 'cheeky and amusing' paperclip seeking to dictate communication styles? Or by Word 2000's disturbing ability to automatically replace 'organise' with 'organize' without even so much as a by-your-leave? Now I have nothing against my American cousins, but our languages are distinctly different, (as my American girlfriend will testify) and I don't fancy being Americanised.

What can be done?!?

Has anyone got anyone got any creative ways to fight back against the Microsoft linguistic orthodoxy?

Is there a movement to ensure continued linguistic diversity in the English language?

Have any virus writers out there considered attacking the Microsft dictionary to insert amusing synonyms randomly in to documents authored in Word. (Personally I would target the word 'leverage'!).

After reading your post I decided to check my Word '97 program to see if I would get similar problems.

If you don't like the paper clip, you should be able to change it to something like Einstein, Shakespear, or a really cool bouncing red ball!

It still is annoying. A year ago in typing class while we were studying the proper way of typing business letters, right after I typed "Dear Sir/Madam:" it popped up with a message that said "It looks like you're writing a letter. Would you like help with that?" Or something like that anyways. I've learned to ignore it since then.

About the language problem, I don't know about your software but mine comes with different spelling dictionaries for most if not all world languages including the different English dialects. Go to Tools, then Language, then Set Language for your particular language. Things should automatically change.

You CAN send me a message here. Just type my user name in "send private."

I've found that if Word changes a word on you, you can just go past the word and then come back to it changing what you need and then just click back to where you were. It will only change a word when you press Enter or the space bar, so if you change a word and don't press one of these, then it will stay how you want it.

I've often found that when putting in an abbreviation with a period at the end it will capitalize the next word you type thinking that it's a new sentence. Just by letting it do this and coming back to the word you can get rid of this problem.

Has anyone got anyone got any creative ways to fight back against the Microsoft linguistic orthodoxy?

One of the things that I was delighted to discover when I switched from Office 97 to Corel's WP8 was a much wider range of English variants to choose from. WordPerfect even offers Australian English as a choice, and, as that is as close to NZ English as any word-processor is ever likely to offer, I have set that as my default. Now I get pinged whenever I spell a word -ize, instead of -ise. How's that for killing two birds with one stone? Break from M$ hegemony, and get more choices as to the default language for your spell-checker

Much as it goes against the grain to defend Microsoft, it is only fair to point out that the Word 97 running on my computer at present has nine different 'English' language options, including both Australian and New Zealand English as separate options.

I LOATHE the paperclip and any variation on him. If I've refused help in writing a letter evey time for the last three years, can't the little @?#! take a hint and buzz off? And not come back till I ask for him, which will not be soon, let me assure you!

...talking of linguistic orthodoxy, I see I've assumed the loathsome little paperclip is male. Apologies to all you normal (or at least, if not normal, not loathsome) males out there!

Much as it goes against the grain to defend Microsoft, it is only fair to point out that the Word 97 running on my computer at present has nine different 'English' language options, including both Australian and New Zealand English as separate options.

Scraping the egg off his face, Max reports that when he checked his Word 97, the default language was set to, New Zealand English.

Talk about feeling sheepish! I guess it's just been so long since I used it that I had forgotten. I found the grammar checking in WP much better at offering assistance with a nasty little habit I have of over-using the passive voice. That, and, of course, it's not M$. Still, I shall test out M$ Word and see how NZ its English is. Our English is now liberally sprinkled with Maori terms that have become part of standard NZ English, so it will be interesting to see if Word will accept thm.

The paperclip twerp does have a disticntly male leery wink when you close him down. Which, now that I have noticed it, contributes greatly to his overall loathsomeness!

In reply to:
I've found that if Word changes a word on you, you can just go past the word and then come back to it changing what you need and then just click back to where you were. It will only change a word when you press Enter or the space bar, so if you change a word and don't press one of these, then it will stay how you want it.

I've often found that when putting in an abbreviation with a period at the end it will capitalize the next word you type thinking that it's a new sentence. Just by letting it do this and coming back to the word you can get rid of this problem.

The way to stop the bloody thing from doing it once and for all is as follows:

1. Go to Tools -- Autocorrect
2. If you don't want it to automatically capitalise after a full stop untick the box marked Capitalise first letter of sentence.
3. To stop it making unwanted "corrections" to your deathless prose, scroll down the list at the bottom until you find the correction and then select it. Press delete.

Now, can someone tell me how, when I start a new line after writing a date, to stop it from putting in that day's date? For example if, today, 4 September 2000, I write 31 August 2000 and then start a new line it automatically puts 31 August 2000-9-4 or something equally unwanted.

Bingley

<start a new line after writing a date, to stop it from putting in that day's date?>

I'm afraid I don't really understand the Windoze version of Word, but I suggest you will only get the unwanted "full date" if you hit Return immediately. Eschew this and you will probably have no problem. E.g. just go somewhere else in your document and come back later! Or do whatever you need to do in Windoze to avoid "Return" . Bill Gates, you have a lot to answer for!

Rgds, lusy

Sorry folks I have only ever seen the paperclip once. He had the cheek to offer to help me type a letter once and only once!
To extinguish him forever go to "help" across the top bar and select - "hide office assistant" - result (in my case at least) - gone forever!

Next item - how do you stop it making adjustments which you sometimes want and sometimes do not want - eg. turning things into hyperlinks, capitalising etc ... immediately hit the edit button on the toolbar and choose "undo auto format/correct whatever" it will go away!