This makes me wish I knew enough about computers to build my own website. I've got this great collection of pet rocks, all of whom are wishing they could achieve internet stardom and its attendant immortality.

Some of my pets are gneiss, some of them are not so gneiss, particularly if you take them for granite. I've written bios of most of them, which will eventually be published as "Pet Rocks' Lives."

My favorites, though, are two pieces of fools' gold, which were originally tamed by two female relatives of William Penn. Yep, they're the pyrites of Penn's Aunts.

Most of my pebbles not house-broken, unfortunately, so I'm constantly having to pick up their little piles of schist.

Some of them are endomorphs, some are ectomorphs, but the majority are metamorphs. These don't lava handling too much, though they try to be magmanimous about it. Sometimes I even have to pumice them, though usually being sedimentary with them will keep them in line, particularly if you talc to them right.

I just chalk it up to being a good parent.

TEd

In reply to:

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Yep, they're the pyrites of Penn's Aunts.

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wasn't that written by Filbert and Sullivan?

That's right, eta - my grandfather was related to his wife, Hazel. Of course, we had relatives from Brazil, as well. Descendants of hers, from the branch that moved to Germany, escaped from East Berlin in the 1960s - they were known to us as the Wall nuts. We looked down on them, of course, as they came quite low in the family pecan order. But even they rated higher than the relative who ran away and joined the circus and became a clown - his name was Coco.

Some of the Berlin branch went to Italy, which means I have a young fourth-cousin twice-removed who is going through a teenage time of heavy drinking and constant head-colds - we call him Pissed Achoo.
There is also a collateral branch who moved to the Middle-East in the eighteenth century, enbraced islam and became absorbed into the Arab culture; they now have branches all over the world and go under the name of Al Mond.

There is another family with the same surname, who are immensely rich, but they aren't related, unfortunately. And they are dealt with in another thread.

Isn't it nice to have interesting relatives?

Your pets remind me, an old bronx gal, about a famous NY saying..(taught to me by Sidney Hortstein, of the AMNH)

The Bronx is gneiss,
Manhattan is shcist,
and NY is not with out its faults..
still, all over is its a Marble-us place.

(all of which happens to be true!)

I should have bolted when I had the chance!

I guess I'll go listen to some Tchaikovsky...

I should have bolted when I had the chance!
Too right, eta - this thread really screws you up.


I guess I'll go listen to some Tchaikovsky...

How Suite.
Is that his Ball music ? [I mean music for dancing balls, of course]

[I mean music for dancing balls, of course]

I've never seen balls dance. I've seen beans jump, though.

if this goes much further, we'll all be getting a bit teste...

Rhuby:

I've been acorn to follow up on this to tell you about some of the nuts in my family. One of my favorites is living on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, where he makes his lving collecting shells. A true beachnut.

There's one who is a bit of a black sheep, spending all of his time chasing women. He's our Macadamia nut, of course. Other family members, cognizant of his penchant for big boobs, refer to him as a chestnut. Due to my penchant for building furniture, I'm of course thought of in some branches of the family as a pine nut.

Then there's Gesundheit, so called because he's a cashew. My distant cousin is into personal data devices, so he's often referred to as a palm nut, though there are some in our family who think he's called that because of a certain penchant for autoeroticism (which is NOT getting it on in the back seat of the car.)

My great uncle is a noted entomologist, but since many in our family can't spell that we just think of him as our betel nut. His wife only works on wick ends, so we call her our candlenut.

TEd

aw, nuts!

I'm all shelled out over this one... and I think there are no stones left unturned...

Dear TEd: Was there never a Mannekin Pis in your family? A little peanut?

I've seen beans jump, though.

I've only seen runner beans. Maybe they were practicing?


They were a bit green, come to think of it.

don't forget the human beans...

¡Ah, si! I too have seen the frijoles jump.

I've seen beans jump, though.

I've only seen runner beans. Maybe they were practicing?


Maybe they suffer, as did the cook in my Dad's Sarf-Lunnon caff, from "haricot veins"