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Posted By: musick Bar Time - 05/22/02 02:37 PM
Here's a thread to quote quips found on signage in your local pub, restaurant or bathroom wall (please, no bumper stickers... or I'll YART you )

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"My wife has a drinking problem - ME"

"God made just so many perfect heads
...he covered the rest with hair"

"Avoid hangovers... stay drunk"

"Rehab is for quitters"

...and my favorite...

Wo ich bin ist chaos -
- aber ich kann nicht uberall sein! (I know what it means, but I'll leave the *translation to you pro's)

Posted By: RhubarbCommando Re: Bar Time - 05/22/02 03:19 PM
"Please do not order drinks whilst the bar is in motion."

"We have an arrangement with the local bank:
They do not serve alcohol; we do not cash cheques."

Posted By: slithy toves Re: Bar Time - 05/22/02 06:24 PM
This one creaks, but I still see it: probly cause I keep going to the same bar

"Our service isn't slow and it isn't fast--it's half-fast."

Posted By: musick Re: Bar Time - 05/22/02 07:23 PM
"Beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder."

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Above a urinal:

"Don't look up here cuz the joke is in your hand!"

Gotta go...

Posted By: AphonicRants Re: Bar Time - 05/22/02 07:25 PM
Above a urinal: "Express Lane: Two Beers or Less"


Posted By: TEd Remington Re: Bar Time - 05/22/02 07:36 PM
Or not two beers.

Posted By: lusy Re: Bar Time - 05/22/02 11:02 PM
"No Bloody Swearing!"

lusy
Posted By: Geoff Re: Bar Time - 05/23/02 01:38 AM
Sign over toilet: In case of air raid, hide under here. It hasn't been hit yet!

Posted By: Faldage Re: Bar Time - 05/23/02 11:11 AM
Risking YART

IITYBMAB

Posted By: Capital Kiwi Re: Bar Time - 05/23/02 06:45 PM
"We are but the intermediaries between the brewer and the sewer"

Posted By: Faldage Re: Bar Time - 05/23/02 06:55 PM
We don't buy the beer, we just rent it.

Posted By: AphonicRants Re: Bar Time - 05/23/02 07:22 PM
Do I sense a reprise of the famous micturation-coloration debate between wow and faldage?

Posted By: Alex Williams Re: Bar Time - 05/23/02 09:54 PM
"If you're a self-starter the boss won't have to be a crank." (Rosebud, Lexington, Kentucky)

"For every order, a can is opened and the contents microwaved to perfection. Please be patient -- quality takes time." (Cat's Cradle, Chapel Hill, North Carolina)



Posted By: Angel Re: Bar Time - 05/24/02 12:56 AM
"24 cans in a case. 24 hours in a day. Coincidence??"

"BEER! Helping ugly people get laid since 1865"

Posted By: barnwitch Re: Bar Time - 05/25/02 11:38 PM
"A woman once drove me to drink...and I never had the opportunity to thank her."

"Never criticize a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, because then you're a mile away, and you have his shoes!!!"

Posted By: musick Re: Bar Time - 05/27/02 02:55 PM
IITYBMAB

Is that a question or a statement?

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"Please don't throw cigarette butts in the urinal...

... they get soggy and hard to light!"



Posted By: dxb Re: Bar Time - 05/27/02 04:26 PM
"Don't drink my beer - I'm coming back and I've spat in it."
"So've I."

Posted By: Geoff Re: Bar Time - 05/27/02 10:16 PM
"BEER! Helping ugly people get laid since 1865"

Oh, thank you, Angel! I'll give it a try!

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