I propose a game. Our resident improv artist, FB, might be especially familiar with this. The point is to have an entire conversation in only questions.

I'll start:

Hey - who put that cactus here?

Is it in your way?

Can't you see that I can't get to the refrigerator?

What do you want in the 'fridge?

So where else should I put it, already?

Would it hurt to just walk right over the cactus?

OUCH; geez - what do you think?

Ouch?

Don't you know what over means?

Hey... are you getting smart with me??

Can't you Just move the darn cactus!

How do you expect me to move it when it keeps trying to bite me?

 

Can't you do anything for your self? do i have to do everything arround here?

So, are you saying that I don't do any work around here?

Do you have to ask that question? don't we both already know the answer?

Why do we always fight like this? Don't you love me anymore?

If I didn't love you as much as ever, would i care about how you behaved?

I hate quarrelling like this; shall we make it up in bed?

Have you ever known me to say "No" to a request like that?

Let's go to the bedroom, then... um... er.... I'm sorry, what's your name again?

Why should wow be penalized for emphasizing an obvious question with an exclamation mark? wow, this does not mean I have declared a truce in our baseball tug-of-war

What's up with you and Wow? is there an other pairing up here at AWAD?

Shouldn't we be devising a new punctuation mark to signify exclamatory questions, like that what wow just said, like?

are you still hung up with the idea of group sex? can i invite someone else to join us?

So, is my love-making not good enough for you any more?

Didn't she add the all important Can't you after the whistle was blown?

Will she confess?

Didn't you notice, it was flatlander who invited me into his bedroom?

Are you trying to duck out of your implied assent to my original question, then?

Don't you know the expression The more, the merrier"?

Sparteye, isn't this the most fun game? Why don't we have some other improv. games? How about "the world's worst"?
---
PS: Is Max axed?

Hey, Max - did you aks to borrow my initials?

You think down is up, and you expect me to listen to you?

>Why do you aks if If I've been aksd?

Was not your sentence lax in being a question, Max? Answer, woncha?

What are you doing here on-topic, mavarchierick?

...is there another pairing?

Why does the simple, generic act of speaking out against injustice always seem to trigger the gossip-mongers? Why can't someone offer this noble gesture to even the likes of Red Sox fans if need be?

And why shouldn't there be a new punctuation mark to indicate an exclamated question to save me the dilemma of pissing off the Punctuation Gods time and time again?!?!?!???

>Look again, why don't you? Did I not say, "haven't you ever heard of an interrobang?!"?
Tell me again won't you? Does half a question look like a full question to you?

>Speaking of questions, may one call the history of sausages Bangerlore?
Do you think I do not know what your actual question is?
Do you think I don't know that you actually wanted to ask, "May one call a certain abundance Bang-galore?"?

(Enough? I win?)

> Do you win? Hmm, how can I answer this? Is Smashin' Sachin the best batsman since The Don? Was Krishna Arjuna's charioteer? Was Parvati the mother of Vinayak? Is Kali a killer? Is a great curry a sublime joy? May I stop now? Or must I go on?

Are you amazing or are you amazing? WOW!
(Okay I lose now, but it was a warranted wow.) (gobsmacked e)

Darling, who invited all these AWADtypes into our bedroom?

?

Too many years writing headlines, leaving out implied words ... Thanks Whit! Let's keep 'em guessin' !! ??
Back to the game :
I've been taking care of you all these years and you ask me my name? What kind of game are you playing?

Can't I leave you kids alone for even a few hours? Can't you all play nicely together just once? What am I, the referee?

And who kicked over the cactus?

Hey, Mom - can't you see that we ain't doin'nuthin' bad?

And, Helen, did you see the cat kick that cactus down, same as I done?

Mom? Can I have some Ice-cream?

Can't you teach these kids to say "Please"?

Who's on first?

What's on second?

Is the Third Man coming?

You know the fellows' names?

I don't know who's on third?

Is there someone in the bedroom?

Who keeps putting this cactus in my way?

Who put the overalls in Mrs. Murphy's chowder?

Does your chewing gum loseHi AnnaSits flavor on the bedpost over night?

Does the spearmint lose its flavor
On the bedpost over night?
If you pull it out like rubber
Will it snap right back and bite?
If you paste it on the left side
Will you find it on the right?
Does the spearmint lose its flavor
On the bedpost over night?

Is there an echo in here?

Little Sir Echo, how do you do?

How does he do what?

Has anybody seen my cactus?

How can I see it when I am sitting on it?

Then how do you know you're sitting on it?

Hey guys, did you ever give a thought to that poor cactus? Don't you think it's pretty much beat up by now? Can't you think of other ways to get excited?

Haven't you heard the Beatitude: "Blessed is he who sits on a cactus, for he shall rise again"?

And aren't there other selections from the "Book of Cactus Beatitudes" such as "he who sits on mighty cactus is a multi-pointed individual?" And don't those ladies who might be noting the non-gender-neutral he in the proverb realize that if I used "she sits on a mighty cactus" I'd run the risk of being labeled a misogynist?

Then, wouldn't your point be lost in the missage?

Won't someone remove the acupuncture plant from my posterior?

> POP <

There -- does that feel better?

No, it doesn't bloody feel better and what about the bloody big hole it's left in me bum? And what are you gonna' do about it?

Well, should we call a proctologist or a botanist?

Is your sympathy with the cactus, or with me?

Is this another one of those blankin' duplicate posts!? Is this a segue into my warmth for thorns and their prickings!?
How's that for some makeshift editing?

Am I sorry that my sympathy is with the thorns?

DONG! That's a definite full stop, twice over. edit: When the toad hops up with Could they be remiss with their expedience, mav-arch? in a hopeless attempt to confuse the issue, does he understand the word cheat? [/edit!]

Shall we play another round?

Did someone think my thorny query was not originally a question? Could they be remiss with their expedience, mav-arch?

Does this have anything to do with that game they do sometimes on the show Who's Line Is It Anyway?

Won't you stop pitying that inside-out pincushion and put a diaper on my perforations?

put a diaper on my perforations?

What's your hat size, Doctor B?

What's your hat size, Doctor B?
Would you believe 7 1/2? And can't you see I have only one hat? Are you offering me yours?

<When the toad hops up with Could they be remiss with their expedience, mav-arch? in a hopeless attempt to confuse the issue, does he understand the word cheat?>

Does our shaman of dubious entity understand that when he equates toad with the image of a cheat he is bound to libel and raise the ire of our froggy, new-fatherhood friend? right, Hyla?

And doesn't it seem that his phrase DONG! That's a definite full-stop, twice over. is the first non-question so brazenly posted in violation of the rules? And wasn't he really just pricking his own balloon?
And with this is there any reason I should not wholeheartedly rest my case? And will my said-accuser ever address the arch-Sybilhood of his appearances on this board, or will he just continue to hide behind the cactus flower?

do any of you have the slightest notion of just how confused and raddled I feel after reading all of this at this late juncture?! do you care?

You're probably confused because all of the Questions threads interweave, aren't you? By the way, have you seen my duck anywhere?

Is this it? Or is it the one in my bathtub? Or any of the other 19508723547647486 ducks here?

To quote the middle Marx:

"Why a Duck?"

Where is the cactus Marianna gave me? Did't you see me put it in front of the refridgerator? Can't I leave you in charge until I get back? Why are you wearing a diaper? Geez, what happened to my cactus?

consuelo

Dear Consuelo do you really want to know?

P.S. Rapunzel do you need a recipe for duck a l'orange?

Did I really give you the cactus, Consuelo? Why don't I remember that? Why does it all sound so suspicious?

Was it all an anti-cactus conspiracy?

... or was it a "can't I act" us spun seriously?

anti-cactus conspiracy

Isn't it time, thank God, that someone else has become aware of this insidious movement? Don't you know the real underlying motive of the Anti-Cactus Conspirators (ACC) is to eliminate all tequila from the face of the earth!

an anti-cactus conspiracy
Can't I distract us with "antidiscactus"?

What was I thinking about, opening this thread started by my current hostess without her being here to explain it? Oh, yoo-hoo, Sparteye, wherefore art thou at the moment?

{blue]Don't you know the motive of the Anti-Cactus Conspirators (ACC) is to eliminate all tequila from the face of the earth!

If I start drinking this bottle, can you start on that one? How many more have we got to go before we eliminate them all?
Rod

How many more do we have to go before we eliminate them all?

Don't you know that I'm getting my meads thrixed? Can you tell that I wrote this response with another question game in mind, but I have no choice but to post it here?


Do you know, cohort Rod, that our cover you've blown,
So our speed at imbibing must bring our goal home?

Can you see our dilemma as Cuervo's world squirms?--
Pray, which one of us, sir, will eat all the worms?

Don't you know that I'm getting my meads thrixed?

Didn't you notice that I tried to merge them as well in another post?

Did you know that the Germans warn against mixin'
your drinks?. Is it four, five, or perhaps six in
the same glass is the most? Do you want to perm-
anently damage yourself and become a diet of worm?

Rod

Would Luther have recanted if he'd had a few under his belt? Or did he not recant because such was the case?
http://www.augustana.edu/religion/lutherproject/TemporalAuthority/dietofworms.htm

And why did this thread suddenly go w-i-d-e?