I had an argument with a very opinionated friend (male) initially about the meaning of 'uxorious' which I first described as meaning 'as a wife' and he looked up and found its actual meaning - 'submissive to a wife...'
Now I want to know if there are words that describe
-'acting like a wife' ie domestically-inclined
-acting like a husband (?)
-being submissive to a husband (or would the word 'submissive' by itself cover that base?)
thanks

...the Oxford English Dictionary offers
"maritorious," and defines it as "fond of one's
husband." The usage example provided--dames
maritorious ne'er were meritorious--would seem to
incorporate sufficient verbal spandex to accommodate
the concept of an excess of devotion."
- Mark Kearney

Welcome erex. This is an intersting question. I'm looking forward to seeing everybody's input.

As to my two-cents...

I have a friend who used to use the word "domesticated" to mean a woman who has become proficient as a wife. It irked me no end, since she was a feminist zealot and meant it as an insult (even the sweetest words can be used as isults when said in a certain way) but I'm not sure it was quite wrong.

What do you all think?

welcome, erex!

just going by the latin here: uxor = wife (from which we get - I assume - uxorious) so i would assume that the word would be something derived from vir, which literally means man but is also used to mean husband. no idea what it is, though.

vir, which literally means man but is also used to mean husband.

Maritus is the common Latin word for husband.

>Maritus is the common Latin word for husband.

thus the nonce(?) word maritorious.
here's Quinion: http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-mar1.htm

Quinion

Damn! and I read Bussy d'Ambois once. Still own a copy. Anyway, not quite sure where the -or- comes from (other than by false analogy with uxorious).

In legal pleadings, one often sees a man's name, identified as a party to a lawsuit, followed by the Latin "et ux." or "et uxor" meaning that the man, his wife, and their marital community are all party to the suit. There is not, to my limited knowledge, an equivalent for men, likely because such a form of suit (by or against a wife and, more generally, against her husband and their marital community) was exotic if not impossible.

Padre, your note reminds us that there has actually been some social progress in the last 150 or so years. There was a time, of course, when a married woman had no right to bring a lawsuit; her husband had to do it for her. I took a course in college (as an undergraduate) dealing with the history of manufacturers' liability in tort (really fascinating, if you can believe it). The first one discussed was Thomas & Wife vs. Winchester, from the 1800's, wherein Mrs. Thomas was poisoned by a bottle of proprietary medicine she purchased at a shop. She couldn't sue; her husband had to sue for her.

Bobyoungbalt correctly states the case, which is famous not as a case about gender equality, but serves as a fair enough example of the state of the law as recently as 150 years ago. Read the opinion for yourself at http://www.lawrence.edu/fast/boardmaw/Thomas_Winc.html

But not often does one see the wife's name first. My ex-wife, Marti Cline, and I were defrauded in a Truth in Lending Act violation and filed suit against the car dealership.

The attorney filed the case as "Martha Cline et ux vs. Springfield Toyota." I told him his Latin wasn't up to snuff and he just smiled and said, "We're here to win this case, not quibble over whether ux. means wife or the spouse of the other person." He was right and we did win the case. They actually changed the interest rate disclosure after we signed the paperwork. And they used a different typewriter!

They actually changed the interest rate disclosure after we signed the paperwork. And they used a different typewriter!
So helpful to have stupid criminals!

Maritus is the common Latin word for husband.

oops! sorry - that's what an incomplete latin course will do to you!

sorry

That's not to say that Romans didn't say vir for husband, too, or on occasion.

Was this ex-wife a lawyer too TEd. That might explain why the attorney used her name first - it would have been the whole "colleague" thing.

Actually it was the order in which our names were listed on the bill of sale and Leonard (his name REALLY was Leonard Bernstein) was just having a bit of fun on what he assumed was a borderline frivolous lawsuit.

He was gobsmacked when they settled out of court for five times the maximum we could have been awarded had the case proceeded to trial. Of course at the time we were unaware of the forged documents, which we found out about during discovery.

The OTHER Leonard Bernstein once said: "Music can name the unnameable and communicate the unknowable."

I want to know if there are words that describe
'acting like a wife' ie domestically-inclined
-acting like a husband (?)
-being submissive to a husband (or would the word 'submissive' by itself cover that base?)

When in doubt, let's go back to first principles.

It is only since the 1950's that women have enjoyed 'economic freedom', at least, 'economic freedom' of opportunity, in North America [or anywhere else in the world].

It is only since then that the concept of "women's liberation" took root anywhere in the world.

So, we should not expect to find a replacement for "uxorious" unless we look for a word which has emerged to describe the new paridigm since then.

I would argue that no such word has 'emerged'.

What this tells us, of course, is that words evolve in tandem with cultural realities, that our language is dynamic and not static.

This is where our 'prescriptionists' fail us. They are tied to what has been, every bit as much as a movie star of the silent screen who has been left behind by the 'talkies'.

Our language does not sit still, any more than our culture and our cultural values "sit still".

Obviously, we need a new word in our language to describe a woman who is married who is the equal or the superior of her mate. Not a pejorative term like "termagant", but a word which expresses our real-world modern reality.

Looking for a latin root, rooted in the past, seems an unlikely place to look for such a word, wouldn't you say?

Our "prescriptionists" are nothing more than toadies of the tomb.

Who are these 'prescriptionists', you say?

They are the olicarps, my friends.

Show me a "prescriptionist", and I will show you an olicarp.

Show me a "prescriptionist", and I will show you an olicarp

They are nothing more than vivified statuary --- which flatters them, actually.

They are more like vivified monuments.

They are more like vivified monuments

Yes, that's it! They are Carpalonuments.

this is indeed most useful - and does offer the most latitude-
thanks.
Erica

Geez, tang. If you're going to talk to yourself at least have the decency to use different names.