Does anyone know the word for...?

Wordsmith.org

You know how exciting it is when you discover there's a word for something you've always wanted to be able to describe? Like "petrichor", for example. Does anyone know if there's a word that describes the feeling of being embarrassed for someone else--like when someone makes a fool of themselves or is humiliated? Not quite pity, but not really embarrassment either. I've wanted to be able to describe this for years.

Thanks!

Hi wellymabel.

I don't have the word you seek, although I certainly have plenty of use for it. If some kind soul could point us in the right direction, I could have a code word for my husband when we are out in public.

compassion?

You sound like Steffie from White Noise by Don DeLillo.

Quote:

Steffie is slightly younger than Denise, a sensitive child who, while watching television with her family, ''becomes upset when something shameful or humiliating seems about to happen to someone on the screen'' and stands outside the room while Denise gives a running commentary on the action.

�NY Times

I'd call it vicarious embarrassment.

the feeling of being embarrassed for someone else is not unfamiliar to me. But on closer inspection, I think we are mostly embarassed for ourselves by the actions of the other.

Try Googling as follows: embarrassment intitle:synonyms

Empathy would include "vicarious embarrassment" but also any other emotion. Empathbarrassment? (^_^)

Quote:

Hi wellymabel.

I don't have the word you seek, although I certainly have plenty of use for it. If some kind soul could point us in the right direction, I could have a code word for my husband when we are out in public.

Not a single word we have for this feeling, but the standing definition is 'substituted shame'. Too long for English use , I guess.

Quote:

the feeling of being embarrassed for someone else is not unfamiliar to me. But on closer inspection, I think we are mostly embarassed for ourselves by the actions of the other.

Right string, right yo-yo, wsieber.
By social extention we are embarrassed for ourselves.

For example, the same faux pas that enjoins our empathy when committed by a member of the in-group is often cause for a giggle or grin when commited by a member of the out-group.

Either way we here are guilty of a snide paternalism in that we are holding ourselves to be superior to those who simply don't know the social conventions of the nonce.

Now you all go forth from these pages and become better people. ()

Do not these embarrassment feelings stretch further than just the 'in-group' or 'out-group'? When you see an openly lying politician does that not give you the same feeling of shame? Or when someone on TV you don't know at all happily throws away intimicies you would not want to hear about at all? (I always shun those programs)
How does that work in this context? , with the paternalistic aspect and all.
Or is there a sharp difference between embarrassment and shame?

Quote:

Now you all go forth from these pages and become better people. ()

But, I can't !

Quote:

But, I can't !

To which side?

I turned up commiserate and condolence by entering "pity for others' embarrassment" in OneLook's reverse dictionary

Maybe there's no exact word

how about (once again!) compassion?
Deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it.

it is said to be a synonym for pity, but based on the word passion, (to burn).

We say "verg�enza ajena", which translates as "embarrasment for others". We seem to feel this for people we don't know or don't particularly like (e.g. the politicians in the example below), so there's no real element of compassion...

This doesn't help at all with the initial question, sorry...

it is said to be a synonym for pity, but based on the word passion, (to burn).

What does passion have to do with burning? It's from the past passive participle (passus) of the Latin deponent verb patior 'to bear, support, undergo, suffer, endure'.

Cool, zmjezhd--thank you.

Edit: I have a vague memory of this very topic (embarrassed for someone else) being discussed here a l-o-n-g time ago; but no memory of whether there was an answer, unfortunately. Even if there was a keyword that would be a fairly outstanding search term, it wouldn't do me any good because I can't access the old board. Perhaps someone whose browser will let them would be willing to give it a try.

Edit #2: Ooh! If patior has a soft t, then...---> patience!

Myr, good one. Did you try it and how did it work