Sent to me by a friend still toiling in the media vineyard.

New Words for the Twenty-first Century Workplace
BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.

MOUSE POTATO: The online, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.

PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

SQUIRT THE BIRD: To transmit a signal to a satellite.

STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.

SWIPED OUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.

TOURISTS: People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."

XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.

ALPHA GEEK: The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group.

ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.

CHIPS & SALSA: Chips = hardware, Salsa = software.
"Well, first we gotta figure out if the problem's in your chips or your salsa."

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

YUPPIE FOOD STAMPS: The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal, "We each owe $8, but all anybody's got are yuppie food stamps."

SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.

404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. "Don't bother asking him, he's 404, man."

GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints,strip malls,subdivisions. Used as in "We were so lost in Generica that I forgot what city we were in."

OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.