OK. Two hours of hard slog produced this:

Snippety-snappety,
Jennifer Aniston's
Famous for "Friends," and for
Wedding Brad Pitt.
But, for the majors in
Astrotrichology,
Jennifer's hairdo is
Her greatest hit.

(A postscript:
I didn't see Capfka's eerily similar "snippery snappery" till just now, when paging through the thread again. Coincidence! Just in case this is a faux pas, though, I ask Capfka to remember the utterance of the rookie stock clerk, who, hefting heavy boxes in his arms, enviously watched the skilled men moving stock with trim machines. "To bear is human," sighed the rookie, "but to forklift, divine!")