Oh, ANNA, what a great thing! I LOVE that!!
I put in a "story", and here's--er, 'ere's--what I sound like with a Cockney accent--I am rolling!
"Last night as I were copping ready for bed, sumfink on the bloody wall above the chuffin' headboard caught me attention. (I may 'ave mentioned before that if there is a bug anywhere in a room, right, I will spot it.) It 'ave a looked like a cross between a silverfish and a millipede. It were at least two inches long, and it were 'orrible! Blimey! I ran and got the flyswatter, but I were so nervous I didn't 'it 'im square, but 'e at least did fall dahn the wall, init? Then I couldn't stand the ffought that I might not 'ave killed it--sumfink like that creepin' 'round 'oo-knows-where wile I'm bloody well asleep?, then? No thank yer! Honest guv!! So I tugged the bloomin' bed out and seen the body. Then I ran and got the vacuum wiv its attachments, right, so I could suck 'im up from a safe distance--and do yer know, wen I touched 'im wiv that tube, he tried ter get oray?, isit? I 'ADN'T killed 'im! Struth! 'orrors! Oi! (I'm copping the shivers now, right, just finkin' about it.) I 'urried up and stuffed the vacuum hammer and tack into the hall closet, in case 'e still weren't dead and made 'is way hammer and tack out. Ew-w-w."
The one I wrote it for will recognize it as:
Last night as I was getting ready for bed, something on the wall above the headboard caught my attention. (I may have mentioned before that if there is a bug anywhere in a room, I will see it.) It looked like a cross between a silverfish
http://www.westext.com/silverfish_picture.html and a millipede
http://members.tripod.com/amyritchie/millipede.html. It was at least two inches long, and it was
horrible!I ran and got the flyswatter, but I was so nervous I didn't hit him square, but he at least did fall down the wall. Then I couldn't stand the thought that I might not have killed it--something like that creeping around who-knows-where while I'm asleep?? No thank you!! So I tugged the bed out and saw the body. Then I ran and got the vacuum with its attachments, so I could suck him up from a safe distance--and do you know, when I touched him with that tube,
he tried to get away?? I HADN'T killed him! Horrors! (I'm getting the shivers now, just thinking about it.) I hurried up and stuffed the vacuum back into the hall closet, in case he still wasn't dead and made his way back out. Ew-w-w.
OP
Bad enough she's a hood!
