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#60759 03/17/02 06:08 PM
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8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.......A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male.........A device for scanning through all 175 channels every 5 minutes


...and the explaination is:

Men are smart enough to know there is nothing good on anyway, but too dumb to pick the best of what is there and stick to it...

whereas

Women are smart enough to have tennacity but don't know that they made the wrong choice.

I know I'm in trouble now but I don't know with whom!


#60760 03/17/02 06:45 PM
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Hmmm. I thought you lived on the east coast, not in San Francisco!


Hehehe. cute.


k



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Oh, all right, I’ll do it ladies. It is evident somebody is shaking the hive to anger the bees. It’s like a kiddy throwing a tantrum to attract mom’s attention.

_________________________________________________________________

but I also know that only one lady in one million could whip me in a fair fight.

Poor, poor Raymond. Still under the erroneous (look it up dear) impression that brawn is the overall measure of a man. I’m sure most men can beat up most women but that doesn’t make them any smarter. A little look in your biology books (oops, I’m assuming you managed to get to grade 10 in high-school here, please excuse me if you haven’t) will tell you that your physical strength is in no way indicative (do you have a dictionary dear?) of your level of intelligence.

_________________________________________________________________

That said, welcome Raymond .







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Men do indeed use maps; women have no idea what a map is

Sorry, BYB, stales et al, but I gotta add my voice to the protest on this one. I am *very good at both navigating naturally and reading maps, have great spatial awareness, can park a car like a pro and drive better than a lot of blokes I know (and am occasionally courteous to boot). I don't ask for directions either, except as a last resort - because most of the time with my sense of direction and maps to use, I can find my way on my own.

Times have changed boys... ya can't keep these stereotypes going, no matter how much you'd like to. [mock -e] Nice try, though... [bring it on!!-e]

Hev

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the erroneous impression that brawn is the overall measure of a man

Well rung, bel!

About 15 years ago I handled legal work for an office building my company had bought in Houston. After I'd gotten to know the leasing agent we'd hired there, business eventually brought me down to Houston, and we met in person.

Now the agent, Carolyn, was 6'0" tall (1.83 meters), strikingly good looking, and a flamboyant dresser. The moment we met she looked down on me and drawled, friendly Texas-style, "Yuh know, Ken, Ah didn't know thut they grew thar attorneys so small up thar in Chicahgo." I replied with a wink, "Well Carolyn dahlin', I don't know how you measure down here in Texas, but where I come from we measure our attorneys from the neck up."

Carolyn and I were great friends from that moment on.


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Poor poor Raymond. A little look in your biology books (oops, I’m assuming you managed to get to grade 10 in high-school here, please excuse me if you haven’t) will tell you that your physical strength is in no way indicative (do you have a dictionary dear?) of your level of intelligence. -belMarduk.

Bel, please.

Let me apologize. It's my fault for not keeping Raymond away from my computer. Raymond, you see, is a poor motherless child that lives- if you can call it that- with his drunken father in a single-wide trailer across the tracts, down the street. He is eighteen years old and still in the ninth grade and has no friends. Except me. Sometimes I give him a hot meal and let him play on my computer.

I think that his intemperate remarks were but a cry for attention from a mother he never knew. I scolded him soundly and he has promised not to annoy you people of the board ever again.

Milum.

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Well, Hev, you antipodean sheilas (if that's not a tautology) are, I suppose, different from the run of the mill female in this country. And of course, WOW and Helen, being AWADers, are several cuts above the norm. I guess I have to allow that there will be exceptions, so I can't keep on arguing that no woman knows about maps; obviously there are a few (damn few), just like you may occasionally find a man who has no hesitancy in asking all and sundry for directions, but then there are men who like to wear their wives' or girlfriends' panties.

It's like these females who I've been seeing lately on the home-remodeling shows on the cable channels -- they dress up in overalls and hard hats and have these tool belts and they get out their power drills and electric screwdrivers and attempt to convince the viewers that even though they are women they are competent carpenters, builders, etc. Well, a thumb to the nose to them. First, I don't believe they really know what they're doing, and secondly, I wouldn't marry one of them if they were the only women on earth. [/chauvinist pig rant]


#60766 03/18/02 05:37 AM
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you antipodean sheilas (if that's not a tautology) are, I suppose, different from the run of the mill female in this country. And of course, WOW and Helen, being AWADers, are several cuts above the norm.

Thanks. I think... Fearless... come back and help me out with this one. She'll bring the Tim-Tams, and we'll make you a nice cup of coffee and have a bit of a chat. Gotta sort you out somehow BYB.

In the meantime, I'm not sure how to take Antipodean sheilas as tautology... Unless, of course, you are insulting stales, doc_comfort, paulb, MaxQ, and CapK as well. Or was I just not quite map-readingly-intelligent enough to get your drift? [cheeky-e]

I'm gonna leave that other bit alone... don't have the inclination to debate that right now. I'm SO glad I didn't take up the job offer for that lifestyle show though...

Hev

#60767 03/18/02 01:15 PM
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Raymond... lives across the tracts

Would those be the Bible tracts?

He is eighteen years old and still in the ninth grade

Sure is an articulate guy for a left-back ninth-grader! [impressed]



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Navigation has a lot to do with how you look at time. When I have to travel a long distance over an unknown terrain, I just give myself two hours longer than the trip would take the average driver. I expect to get turned around a lot, expect to get lost, but I keep my eyes and ears open for the things I get to see that the average driver, following the straight and narrow, would have missed. In other words, I relish being lost. I have one friend on this earth who is the same as I--and we have a great time traveling together and seeing all those things we do see when we realize we're lost. In fact, our perception goes up a level just realizing that we're lost.

I have been lost driving a straight interstate route. Honest. I somehow got off the interstate to get a cup of coffee or something, and, when I pulled out of the restaurant parking lot, I somehow pulled out on the wrong side and went up a different interstate. Didn't realize it either for a few miles.

About screwdrivers: I always think in terms of what to use other than a screwdriver--what's handier, closer, just as efficient, etc. This is called creative thinking, and it's much more fun than going out to the garage and pulling out that smelly old toolbox.

Best regards,
WordWoman


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