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Pooh-Bah
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I like to scan the wedding announcements page of the local paper on Sundays, looking for those serendipitous name combinations. One today made me laugh out loud:
CHRISTMAS-BELL
The engagement of Teresa Christmas to Daniel Bell, both of East Lansing, is announced. ..... She is the daughter of Carol and Wesley Christmas of DeWitt. ....
I *do* hope that they are planning a December wedding.
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I love it, I love it!  And Wesley's kinda appropriate too... didn't he write some (albeit dour) Christmas tunes?
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<groan> I do hope they don't present their first-born with the name Carolyn Noel.
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Welcome back, Aunt mav!
I think they should name their first child Jingle,
and the second, Ding-dong.
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old hand
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I once knew the Dressing family... their children were Blue Cheese and Turkey Ann. Yes, really. 
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Pooh-Bah
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I knew someone whose last name was McDade. he was born on December 25, and his parents named him "Chris."
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I've only seen something as silly as Blue Cheese in vanity plates.
the Selzter's had two cars, two vanity plates-- ALKA and BROMO
Alka selzer and Bromo selzer are US brands of antacids
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One of the local alternative newspapers last week published a picture with no caption. (Two pictures, actually). They were so eloquent about the wisdom of the city bureaucrats that they needed no words. The first picture showed about half a block of a downtown street, no cars or traffic, a fireplug near the curb in the foreground. The second was a close-up of the area with the fireplug so you could see, if you hadn't noticed it in the other view, that there is a parking meter right alongside the fireplug.
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I once knew the Dressing family... their children were Blue Cheese and Turkey Ann. Yes, really.
I suppose the chilluns should be grateful that Mom and Pop stopped short of "Ranch" and "1000 Islands" ... although they might be preferable, I suppose.
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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There was that old wretch James Hogg, who named his daughter Ima. Miss Ima (she never married, so she carried the name all her life) was apparently a really neat person and greatly beloved in her community.
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in the Minneapolis phonebook you will find the name Rockets Galore -- and this is evidently not the same person as the recently deceased East Village character actor (Michael Morra).
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...but I just had to ask:
What if Tony Santa married Greta Klaus?...and his brother, Rudolph, was best man?
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in the Minneapolis phonebook you will find the name Rockets Galore --
Er--was this by any chance in The Yellow Pages, under
Escort Services?
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I did know an English woman in Singapore (and this one is true) called Penny Strange who later married a local lad whose surname (I forget his first name) was Chin, and bravely went ahead calling herself Penny Strange Chin. I heard much later they'd got divorced but I don't think that was the reason.
Bingley
Bingley
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In reply to:
in the Minneapolis phonebook you will find the name Rockets Galore --
Er--was this by any chance in The Yellow Pages, under
Escort Services?
well, that was a beauty of a slip... it was meant to be Rockets Redglare, of course (the answer on that one would be NO! -- and shame on you, jackie!!)
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There *is a Cardinal Sin in the RC Church in the Philipines.
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shame on you, jackie!!)I am UTTERLY unrepentant!
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In the days when few houses had running water, there used to be a little house behind the house, sometimes called a backhouse. So Backhouse as a family name seemed risible. One got to be an Admiral, but he never became Lord Keeper of the Privy Seal.
. "Admiral Sir
Roger Backhouse was an old friend and had been Gunnery Officer in Dreadnought "
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The Yellow Pages
One of my favourites from this wonderous tome is a cross-reference link: under the heading ENGINEERS it simply said
see Boring
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enthusiast
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The telephone book in the ski resort town of Sun Valley, Idaho, has a listing for one of the town's many (two-months out of the year) celebrities, Adam West. If you look him up in the white pages, you are directed to check out Bruce Wayne. Under Bruce Wayne, you are directed to Law Enforcement in the yellow pages. Since the real law enforcement is in the blue pages, they had a little fun and completed the circle by sending you back to Adam West.  Now, if I could only find his real home phone number.
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That is only because the intersection of linguaphiles and engineers is nearly a null set. However, engineers are very interesting - to engineers, scientists, and quality managers.
:-)
Cheers,
Bryan
Cheers,
Bryan
You are only wretched and unworthy if you choose to be.
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>the intersection of linguaphiles and engineers is nearly a null set a common enough conception, but not epistemologically grounded.... 
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engineers are very interesting - to engineers, scientists, and quality managers.
I'm a member of a community chorus that does credible jobs on such light weight stuff as the Verdi Requiem the Bach B Minor Mass and similar stuff. At a weekend retreat we had one year, during the brief intro section where we all gave little pocket bios of ourselves I counted about 70% of the 30-40 people we had there had scientific, technical or engineering day jobs.
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"stuff," Faldage?
harrumph® Engineers is engineers....
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I went to school with the Beach (this surname obviously transliterated by some Ellis Island type) twins: Rocky and Sandy.
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Odd street corners and connections in the U.S.: *The corner of Grinn and Barrett drives in West Chester, Ohio *Thisa Way leads to Thata Way and eventually to Bytha Way in Orange County, Calif. *Hickory and Dickory avenues, which intersect Dock Street in Harahan, La. *The corner of Ho and Hum roads in Carefree, Ariz. *Havateur Way in California. *Bland Street and Gore Road intersect in Pueblo, Colo. P.S. I love the Engineers > see Boring bit - I'll get a lot of mileage out of that one!
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Full circle:
Merry Lane and Christmas Lane intersect not too far from where I live. Maybe Sparteye's newlyweds should consider moving there! It is now transitioned to a mostly Jewish neighborhood, but they still continue the Christmas decoration competition each year and folks from all over drive down the two streets to see the lights.
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...such light weight stuff as the Verdi Requiem the Bach B Minor Mass... , ...people we had there had scientific, technical or engineering day jobs.The clarity of this *connection is quite so. Satin - What was that all about... am I glad I missed it?
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Re: on such light weight stuff as the Verdi Requiem the Bach B Minor Mass
reminds me of a friend, chemist turn programer, who, when visiting NY was surprized at by the crowd he encountered at the Met on sunday morning. his comment "only in NY could an artsy-craftsy like this draw a such a crowd".
Somehow, I had never thought of the Metropolitan Museum of Art as artsy-craftsy.
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hey Mav-Beatle fan?
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Hi, Vixy - welcome to the board.
Submarine tastes aside, yes, the Beatles fit into my personal enormous club sandwich between Bach and Linkin Park. So much music out there...!
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Why am I not surprised that she was dumb enough to fall for that? After all, her principal qualifications for the job were 1) a handsome pair of jugs, and 2) a willingness to show them off in a T-shirt. If she collects anything, it will be a miscarriage of justice. And one wonders in what currency she will be paying her lawyers. (Tut-tut -- nasty mind.)
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A former Hooters waitress has sued the restaurant where she worked, saying she was promised a new Toyota for winning a beer sales contest. -- WO'N
Why am I not surprised that she was dumb enough to fall for that? -- BYb
I'm not sure that's quite fair, Bob. I think if my employer told me the same thing, I wouldn't even consider the possibility that they might be lying. Just because she works at a distasteful restaurant doesn't mean she deserves to have a fast one pulled on her by her bosses. I think we would have a different reaction to the story if she was a server at a high-end steak house, or even a diner.
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Gotta disagree with you on this one, Byb. I'm not sticking up for Hooters waitresses or a society that encourages such exploitation, but if her story's true (parking lot, vehicle tax) I think she deserves compensation.
(not that I anything against my anastrophic buddy Yoda have)
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You are out on a limb with this one bob--i have never seen a study that shows any relationship between large breasts and small minds.. but everyone presumes it exists.. there is still the attitude a woman can't be good looking and smart at the same time... and exceptions are "funny"-- (see humor thread, and movie "legally blonde")
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Pooh-Bah
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...relationship between large breasts and small minds...
I need a witty riposte here, but I can't think of one! Apparently, there is some truth to the proposition....
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I doubt very much that the intelligence of the girls who work at Hooters is substantially different from the girls who do not. It may be true that many pretty girls are given the impression that they need not try hard to acquire an education. Modelling is more highly regarded, but otherwise different only in the number of males attempting to grope them. And I believe that pretty girls' mothers not only do not encourage them to enter professions, they often discourage it out of jealousy (Admittedly based on a small number of observationa.)
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need a witty riposte here,
It's only people with small minds who are fixated on big breasts?
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is the con-verse true to? men with big mind fixate on small breast? is there hope for me ?
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is the con-verse true to? men with big minds fixate on small breast? is there hope for me ?
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Spit in my face, you femmes, and peerce my side,
Buffet and scoff, scourge and crucifie mee...
Keeping in mind the observation of a later poet about fools rushing in, and without admitting that I have sinn'd and sinn'd, I venture to point out that y'all have been jumping on me for more than I really said.
I certainly didn't say, or believe, that a woman can't be good looking and smart at the same time, O beloved of Jove. Moreover, your comment seems to contain the hidden premise that all women with large breasts are good looking, which I deny. I have eaten in a Hooters more than once (not by my choice), and can tell you that some of the waitresses look more like cows than beauty queens, mainly because of their excessive mammary development (or, possibly, augmentation). Also, while there, I have seen no young women who seemed to be PhD candidates.
In general, the rest of the blasts seem to be saying pretty much the same thing: that just because a young woman takes a waitress job at Hooters, there should be no presumption that she's under genius-level IQ, and only an unregenerate MCP would imply such a notion.
Let's look at this more closely. [Counsel for the defence rises, pushes his wig back off his low brow.] If it please your Ladyships, may I ask you and the jury to consider these points and answer some questions in your own minds:
1. Whom does Hooters hire as waitresses? (We may dispense with the PC term "waitpersons" or other espressions of that ilk, since, to my knowledge, they hire only females for this job.)
2. Assuming they were alive, available, able-bodied and experienced at waiting tables, would Hooters hire Jackie Onassis, the president of Brown University (I forget her name), Helen Gurley Brown, or Katherine Graham?
3. For that matter, would they hire some of the veteran waitresses, who have been waiting tables for years at any of a number of other eating establishments, who resemble somebody's mother?
4. If a young woman had the background or the education of the women mentioned above, and even if she did have bodacious tatas, would she want to work at Hooters?
5. Given what Hooters pays waitresses (diddly-squat, like most restaurants, making tips the waitress's main source of income), would not a young woman as well-endowed intellectually as she would have to be physically be able to do better at some other job where she can use her intellectual qualifications?
6. I believe we may take it as stipulated that Hooters, while ostensibly an equal-opportunity employer, does not hire anyone as a waitress except good looking and well-endowed young women. I submit to your ladyships that if you have given dispassionate consideration to the questions submitted, you will conclude with me that young women with smarts, education, or what is generally considered good background or bringing up, will regard employment at Hooters as either distasteful, immoral perhaps, or insufficiently remunerative considering that they can almost certainly do better elsewhere. And this even if they did happen to possess the Hooters desiderata. So whom does that leave in the pool of possibilities for employment at Hooters?
M'ladies, the defence rests.
[Doffing wig and gown and putting on hardhat and asbestos suit]
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And be it remembered that fixation on mammary glands is a form of metonymy for a structure almost one hundred percent therewith associated, but not as acceptably referred to.
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Also, while there, I have seen no young women who seemed to be PhD candidates.
Perhaps true. However, how many of the same-aged guys are PhD candidates?
5. Given what Hooters pays waitresses (diddly-squat, like most restaurants, making tips the waitress's main source of income), would not a young woman as well-endowed intellectually as she would have to be physically be able to do better at some other job where she can use her intellectual qualifications?
I've gotta part with ya here, Byb. When I was in school, I knew plenty of intellectually-endowed women taking jobs that paid low but had great flexibility, evening shifts, and other amenities that made college life (for their PhDs perhaps) bearable. Walk around NYU, UCLA, Texas A&M, or other good school, and catch up with those whose parent's aren't paying their way. You'll meet many 3.5 gpa and above waitresses, exotic dancers, newspaper deliverers, and other (what some USns think as)sub-professionals.
Edit: A good example is me. I worked a non-intellectually-stimulating graveyard shift with drug addicts to pay my way through school (with highest honors).
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You'll meet many 3.5 gpa and above waitresses, exotic dancers, newspaper deliverers, and other (what some USns think as)sub-professionals.two outta three, here and dean's list every semester. and it wasn't hooters -- i hate the ugly shorts they make those girls wear 
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A) So they get paid diddly-squat. What're the tips like?
2) Assuming the tips are good, if any male here had some physical characteristic that caused women to leave him large tips would he be considered intellectually challenged to take advantage of the fact?
Þ) Even assuming the woman in question was less than fully intellectually endowed, is that an excuse for leading her down the garden path?
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[rant]
I believe we may take it as stipulated that Hooters, while ostensibly an equal-opportunity employer, does not hire anyone as a waitress except good looking and well-endowed young women. I submit to your ladyships that if you have given dispassionate consideration to the questions submitted, you will conclude with me that young women with smarts, education, or what is generally considered good background or bringing up, will regard employment at Hooters as either distasteful, immoral perhaps, or insufficiently remunerative considering that they can almost certainly do better elsewhere.
can i live on your planet, bob? a place where woman are all smart and have good breeding and have money-- since it money that enable anyone to make choices..
have you seen the studies-- that show, today-- 35 years after the renewed battle for womans equality, that woman still earn only $0.90 for every $1 a man earns? and that is only if she doesn't take of time in her career for child rearing chores.. If she takes of a year or two-- she cuts her potential salary on average by an other nickle.. $45K per annum, not $50-- and then raises expressed as a % of base.. year after year.. so she will never catch up!
women who have smarts go where the money is.. because no matter what they do, they are still likely to be shortchanged! and on top of that-- management still thinks its great fun to promise a toyota-- and in the same breathe talk about cars, trucks, vans. and deliver a $3.95 toy? tell me who is the brainless person here? who thought they could get away with this? Hooter is not some little resteraunt in no where ville. it is a major corporation, with franchizes all over the US.
for half my working career, i worked the "hardware" side of technology. and got nothing but "you're going to fix the machine? i also considered sueing my employer-- since i got told to my face my management, that "you didn't need the promotion and raise-- you have a husband to support you. You shouldn't even be in this job-- you're keeping some man from a decent job" -- and this was a (at the time) a Fortune 500 company!
[/rant]
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Pooh-Bah
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Here's another Dean's List CoEd who worked her way through college with her share of waitressing and similar positions. And when I finally graduated law school and got a job at a firm, I heard "you are too young/pretty to be a lawyer" and had to work to not be cornered by the firm's important clients at the annual holiday party. I've never been to a Hooters, but I salute those who have come after me who can turn their looks to their own profit. The hassle comes regardless, so you might as well take advantage of it. You go girls!
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[crossthreaded from humor, in miscellaneous]
From the Washington Post Style Invitational in which it was postulated that English has male and female nouns, readers were asked to assign a gender to nouns of their choice and explain their reasons. The best submissions:
Detective Novel -- f., because you're not supposed to peek at its end the minute you pick it up.
Swiss Army Knife -- m., because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.
Kidneys -- f., because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.
Penlight -- m., because it can be turned on very easily, but isn't very bright.
Hammer -- m., because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years but it's handy to have around and is good for killing spiders.
Tire -- m., because it goes bald and often is over-inflated.
Hot air balloon -- m., because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it. And, of course, there's the hot air part.
Web page -- f., because it is always getting hit on.
Web page -- m., because you have to wait for it to reload.
Shoe -- m., because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.
Copier -- f., because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed. Because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.
Magic 8 Ball -- m., because it gives monosyllabic answers that usually indicate it did not pay attention to your question.
Ziploc bags -- m., because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.
Sponges -- f., because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.
Critic -- f. What, this needs to be explained?
Subway -- m., because it uses the same old lines to pick up people.
Hourglass -- f., because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.
[thanx (I think) to teD]
p.s. - speaking of hot-air balloons, my lovely bride and I went on a h-ab ride last evening. it was tres cool. the landing was particularly interesting.
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that tsuwm-- in the same vein...
Blenders--m., they make a lot of noise, they are not much use, but you always want to have one around-
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Oops!...What did I do here? I thought this Toy Yoda thing was good for a couple of chuckles, but it's turned the thread into a whirling juggernaut!
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"... a loaf of bread,
a jug of thine, and WOW"
Omar K
(miscellaneous sidebar: in addition to "Wow" what other words both begin and end with "w"?)
Back to topic, a young man named "Sam Manella" played on DePaul University's basketball team some time ago. One trusts that it is coincidental that Sam Manella is now a lawyer in Chicago.
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Sam Manella is now a lawyer in Chicago
Good thing he doesn't run a restaurant.
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If he had been Sal Monella, his DePauw University team could have been named the "Scooters".
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Dear Tsuwm.... thank you for lightening the mood! You have saved us all from getting really serious about a non-word subject!
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addict
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what other words both begin and end with "w"?)
Off the top of my head - willow, wallow, widow, window.....?
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don't forget williwaw!!
edit: and I almost forgot wheelbarrow. ::whew::
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veteran
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I was going to let this controversy (not much of one, actually, since it turned out to be decidedly one-sided) drop, particularly since several members had the good sense to introduce a new, or revived, subject and I was going to make my final remarks in PMs; but I decided that since I'm admitting defeat and conceding that quite a few comments posted on the subject have not only demolished my arguments but have provided this old fogey with some valuable insight on modern women, it's only fair that I do so as publicly as I offended. I herewith acknowledge and commend Sparteye, of troy, caradea, Brandon, Flatlander and AnnaStrophic, whose responses are posted above.
I suppose that having once, a very long time ago now, been a college student in need of tmeporary work to help pay expenses, and living as I do in a city with thousands of students in a dozen or more colleges and universities, it should have occurred to me that a young woman might, with propriety and good sense, accept employment at Hooters or in a similar situation. She might also well believe that the offer of a new "Toyota" was genuine, especially if it was verbal and not written or she didn't think she needed to look at a written offer. The story quoted didn't say anything about this; certainly if "new Toyota" was included in a written announcement, then there was fraud, possibly of a criminal nature.
Anyway, ladies and others, I accept your corrections. I certainly hope that no one supposes that I have, in the last 25 years at least, shared the male chauvinist notions that Helen and Sparteye very properly rant about; my wife took care of that. If I have been somewhat naif regarding what modern young women of intellect and integrity may be willing to undertake (besides working heavy construction jobs, or in other jobs once the exclusive domain of men), then you have been a source of enlightenment and delight. And this really is my last word on the subject. [Cross-my-heart-and-hope-to-die e'con] Unless some of you want to have another go in the chat room, if we ever get together there again.
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That's a handsome statement, BYB, and one that reiterates the magic of this board, where we can all expect to have our presumptions challenged in an enlivening manner. Can't find a way of saying that without a creep of smugness - but what the hell, you are all good company.
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Hmmm, I missed this one. We were talking to a waitress a couple of weeks ago who makes $600 per week, mostly in tips. I don't think she takes any of her clothes off, either. Not to be sneezed at!
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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old hand
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under the heading ENGINEERS it simply said
see Boring
Here in Oregon there's a town named Boring. Until recently, as one entered town, one was greeted by a sign proclaming, "Boring Gospel Hall." Ah, truth in advertising!
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makes $600 per week, mostly in tips. I don't think she takes any of her clothes off, either. Not to be sneezed at!
So what does she take... oh, never mind!
truth in advertising
I think I have mentioned elsewhere the Kent village with a name pronounced by locals to rhyme with ooze but spelled to appear like a rhyme with moose: the sign on the village hall read strangely to visitors' eyes...
LOOSE WOMENS INSTITUTE
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Of course, there is now in the news discussion of the couple who has offered to give a corporate name to their as-yet-unborn child in return for a mere $500,000 gratuity. I can see this ten years down the road: "Can anyone give me an example of irony? Yes, Trojan?"
TEd
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Dear TEd: did the couple get a gratuity or a settlement of a claim for product failure?
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did the couple get a gratuity or a settlement of a claim for product failure?
How delicate of you to say "gratuity", rather than "tip".
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did the couple get a gratuity or a settlement of a claim for product failure?
How delicate of you to say "gratuity", rather than "tip".
(Edit: sorry, folks. I managed to post this same message three times. Dittograph and re-dittograph. Ah, the silliness of youth!)
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Ah, the perils of hyper inflation. AKA viagravation.
TEd
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He's a newbie, TEd - don't rub him up the wrong way!
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He's a newbie, TEd - don't rub him up the wrong way!
Who be a newbie?
My father (a patent lawyer) kept in his files a patent for a "male enhancement device", circa 1910. If I can find it in his warren of papers ...
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I just remembered that the name of the family that started the Toyota Motor Company was Toyoda. A numerologist convinced them that the car would sell better if they changed the name to Toyota.
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I just remembered that the name of the family that started the Toyota Motor Company was Toyoda. A numerologist convinced them that the car would sell better if they changed the name to Toyota.
And, ta da! A dealership was born...
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An' de car was so small youdda t'ought it was a toy!
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LOOSE WOMENS INSTITUTE
Which reminds me of the Goon show which had the following script, kinda:
[rattling and crashing noise in the background]
Neddy: What's that noise?
Henry Crum: Ah, that's just Min falling apart.
[pause]
Henry Crum: She's a loose woman, you know!
FWIW
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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de car was so small youdda t'ought it was a toy!
It *was called Toyopet.
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Honest to God, here in Chicago we now or recently have these four politicians in high elective office(warning: lightly blue):
Dick Phalen, President of Cook County Board
Dick Hardigan, Illinois Attorney General
Dick Devine, Cook County States Attorney, and
Hizzoner Dick Daley, Mayor of Chicago
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Here's one specially for Sparteye:
NPR had a segment this evening on a book about a "woods cop", i.e., a conservation officer, who has a territory in the U.P. of Michigan. The author of the book was being interviewed and noted that the woods cop "is known to have a problem with authority -- he tends to be a lone shark".
(I guess that's the spelling to use; he certainly didn't mean "loan shark". Maybe he dances with sharks.)
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Well at least it's not Cock County, which is what I first read it as.
Bingley
Bingley
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Pooh-Bah
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Kieva, those are great. We have a more pitiable politician in Michigan. Our Lieutenant Governor is Dick Posthumus.
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>- he tends to be a lone shark"
Usury, that would generate a great deal of interest.
TEd
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AAAUUGGHHH! [laughing-while-groaning e]
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Who knows or cares what the topic is, so long as we are having fun?
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