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Posts: 144
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The other parody carol (of which I can only remember the first line) was: While shepherds washed their socks by night....
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Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
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Posts: 10,542 |
>kids are horrid... ...and now they do it with the genuine stuff. 
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Posts: 328
enthusiast
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enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 328 |
My daddy came up with a silly version of "Jingle Bells" to amuse us children when we were little. It goes,
Jingle Bells, shotgun shells, BB's all the way
Oh what fun it is to ride in a beat-up Chevrolet!
Nonsensical it may be, but we loved it and repeated it ad infinitum.
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Joined: Oct 2000
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>>>Jingle Bells, shotgun shells, BB's all the way<<<
sorry, but i don't think your daddy came up with that. i've heard
"Jingle Bells Shotgun Shells" in a number of ways. the one i remember best is:
jingle bells, shotgun shells, granny laid an egg
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 328
enthusiast
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 328 |
Perhaps you're right. But I still think my daddy came up with the "beat-up Chevrolet" part. If you could see our driveway, you would know why. 
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Posts: 2,661
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,661 |
Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg,
The batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker got away, Hey!
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 11,613 |
Musick, you stole the one I was going to put.   I can't believe nobody's put this one yet, to the tune of On Top of Old Smoky: On top of spaghetti, all covered with cheese. I lost my poor meatball when somebody sneezed. It rolled off the table and on to the floor; and then my poor meatball rolled out of the door. It rolled in the garden, and under a bush; and then my poor meatball was nothing but mush.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 3,146 |
Mary had a little hen
She kept it in her pocket.
And every time she let it out
The rooster tried to f - chase it.
Or
Mary, Mary, quite contrary,
How does your garden grow?
With silver bells and cockle shells
And one f***ing tulip.
or
Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to school we go,
With razor blades and hand grenades, heigh ho, heigh ho ...
But as was noted above, this last one is no longer funny.
The idiot also known as Capfka ...
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055 |
Bridget, it was a bit longer and slightly different:
On top of old smoky
all covered with blood
i shot my poor teacher
with a .44 slug
I shot her with pleasure
I shot her with pride
I couldn't have missed her
She was 40 feet wide
i went to her funeral
i went to her grave
some people threw flowers
i threw a grenade.
Her body went up
her body went down
her body went splat!
all over the ground
I looked in her coffin
and she wasn't quite dead
so I grabed my bazooka
and blew off her head.
School education is of such a high standard.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
These are wonderful-- and I wonder if our childhoods-- when we all learned to freely express some hostility -- many of these songs are familiar to me, did something to protect us from acting them out.
My children and and nieces and nephews have heard most of these songs (they have been forced to ride in the car with me) but they don't know them.. songs like these are lost-- and instead-- we have children acting out the actions.
Today's NYtimes has an article about children and violence-- an the idea that children can't even make idle threats-- since there is a policy of "zero tolerance" and each threat is taken seriously-- maybe we need to make sure kids have outlets--safe outlets for urges.. Destruction is a creative impulse.. maybe we need to have creative impulses to make wicked songs.. and not have wicked acts!
most adults are not subject to zero tolerance-- and like Ralph Cramdon, many times, men (women) who have never acted violently-- say "one of these day, pow! right in the kisser" and don't 1) really mean it, 2) don't get prosecute for threatening violence.
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