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Posts: 1,055
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,055 |
There's a host of popular Aussie children's books that are lots of fun:
Far out, Brussels Sprout!, Alright Vegemite! and Unreal Banana Peel!
They have loads harmless rhymes like some of those mentioned. Anyone know these?
From he has the heart of a little child...
... in a jar on his desk.
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Pooh-Bah
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Pooh-Bah
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,773 |
Gee, Dr Bill, just cuz it gets vile ... OK, I'll finish it:
My Bonnie has tuberculosis
My Bonnie has one rotten lung
My Bonnie spits blood in a bucket
And dries it and chews it for gum, yum! yum!
Come up, come up, oh
Come up my supper,
Come up, come up
Come up, come up, oh
Come up my supper,
Come up.
Mason, Jason, get the basin!
Oops! Slop! Get the mop!
+++++++=
Courtesy of MAD Magazine:
(to the tune of Hello, Dolly)
Hello, Deli
This is Joe, Deli
Would you please send up
Some nice corned beef on rye?
A box of Ritz, Deli
And some Schlitz, Deli
Some chopped liver
And a sliver of your apple pie
Turkey legs, Deli
Hard boiled eggs, Deli
Some tomatoes and potatoes you french fry
Oooohhhh
Please don't be late, Deli,
'Cuz I can't wait, Deli,
Deli, without breakfast I will die!
+++++++++
(to the tune of Petula Clark's "Downtown")
When you eat meat
but hate the meat you are eating
Then you've surely got
Ground round
It's so unnerving
when they're constantly serving
In an eating spot
Ground round
They may call it chopped steak,
Salisbury or beef patty
No matter what it's called
It's always overcooked and fatty
What can you do?
Sound off to your waiter there
Loudly pound on the table,
Stand up on the chair,
And shout,
Ground Round,
Piled on my plate I see
Ground Round,
Always you're conning me
Ground Round,
Why must it always be
Ground round, ground round....
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
Edward Lear books of Nonsence have one wonderful stuff too-- all of his many {clean} limricks-Like:
There was an old man with a beard
Who said "It is just as I feared,
Two owl, a hen,
Three larks and wren,
Have all made their nests in my beard!"
He also has a wonderful collection of Flora, all with amazing Latin names...and illistrations of the flora.
and his poems-- Like the Owl and the Pussycat.
All very funny on several levels, so children and parents can enjoy.
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Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
How about "found a peanut?
Found a peanut (x2)
Found a peanut last night
Last night, when I was sleeping
Found a peanut last night?
It was rotten (x2)
It was rotten last night
Last night when i was sleeping
It was rotten last night
(each verse follows same pattern)
Ate it any way
Got sick
Died
I was dreaming
with several varients, some longer--
Very similar to the "the tree is in the Hole" (american)
and "Down in the boggy Oh" (irish)
The tree is in the hole, the hole is in the ground
and the green grass grows all around, all around,
the green grass grows all around...
The tree down in the boggy oh--
Away down in the boggy oh...
Bog, bog, the boggy oh
away down in the boggy oh!
(the tree has a branch,.... the finest branch you ever did see.., the branch is on the tree, the tree is in the hole,
the hole is in the ground...
the tree has a limb, the limb is on the branch, the branch is on the tree, the tree is in the boggy , away down in the boggy oh..
right down to the eyelash on a fledgling...
and
There was an old woman who swallowed a fly,
I don't know why she swallowed a fly
perhaps she'll die?
there was an old women who shallowed a spider
It wiggled and giggled and tiggled insider her
she swallowed the spider to catch the fly,
But i don't know why she swallowed the fly
Perhaps she'll die
there was an old woman who swallowed a bird
How absurd to swallow a bird,
she swallowed the bird to peck at the spider....(repeat words from above.)
there was an old woman who swallowe a cat
Image that, she swallowed a cat!
she swallowed the cat to worry the bird...
there was an old woman who swallowed a dog
What a hog to swallow a dog..
she swallowed the dog to chase the cat.
there was an old woman who swallowed a cow..
I dont know how she swallowed a cow...
she swallowed the cow to kick the dog....
There was an old woman who swallowed a goat
She just opened her throat, and swallowed a goat
She swallowed the goat to nip at the cow,
But i don't now how she swallowed a cow!
She swallowed the cow to kick the dog....
there was an old woman who swallowed a horse!
She died! Of course!
and from Woody Guthry
I'm being swallowed
by a boa constricter, (3 times)
and i don't like it very much!
Oh no, there goes my toe
Oh gee its up to my knee
Oh fiddle, its reached my middle
Oh heck, its up to my neck
Of Fred it swallowed my (GULP!)
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 609
addict
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addict
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 609 |
Boa Constrictor and Woody Guthrie? Shel Silverstein (?sp) isn't it, or was it both? My kids always sang that as "I'm being eaten by a bus conductor"! to link to another thread.(The guy who takes your money on a bus)
Rod Ward
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,400 |
I am almost certain it's a Woody Guthry song-- as is "the wheel of the bus go round and round" (that is definately a Woody Guthry song!)
some of Woody's songs entered the mainstream so quickly-- it was as if they were always there..
Like Tommy Makem's "Four green fields"-- original written as a commercial "background song" for Aer Lingus-- which many now swear is as old as the hills being sung about... and a "traditional song"
meanwhile other traditional songs-- Wabash Cannonball, ie, which is a traditional song, author unknown, have one "version" copyrighted, by one person-- who then try to demand royalties!
Arlo said one of the joys of his childhood, was going to school and having teachers "teach" him songs his daddy wrote!
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 771
old hand
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old hand
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 771 |
Hmm, Sparteye. The version I learned growing up was: My Bonnie has tuberculosis, My Bonnie has only one lung, My Bonnie, she coughs up raw oysters, And rolls them around on her tongue. Ugh.  (By the way, I adore Hello Deli. Never heard it before! Thanks!) 
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Anonymous
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Anonymous
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these remind me of some email that was circulating awhile back (which probably means you've all read these, but in case anyone missed them....) REJECTED CHILDREN'S BOOK TITLES:1. You Are Different and That's Bad 2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables 3. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will 4. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends? 5. Your First Day at School and Why You'll Never Come Home Again 6. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book 7. When Mommy Leaves Daddy, And What You Did to Cause It 8. You Can Make a Plastic Bag Space Helmet 9. Good Night, Closet Monster; Goodbye, Honey 10. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption 11. Grandpa Gets a Casket 12. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator 13. Little Hands, Big Toasters 14. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia 15. Where Would You Like to Be Buried? 16. Your Nightmares Are Real 17. Some Kittens Can Fly 18. Strangers Have the Best Candy 19. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games 20. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy 21. You Were an Accident 22. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry ~b
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409
Carpal Tunnel
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Carpal Tunnel
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 3,409 |
REJECTED CHILDREN'S BOOK TITLES:Oustanding! How many of those fine tomes are on your childrens' bookshelves?  I want to get me a copy of number 7.
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Posts: 460
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Helen, have you ever seen the short (5 mins) animated film of this song made by the National Film Board of Canada in the 1960s? In their version, Burl Ives is the singer. I'm delighted to have a print in the film collection I maintain on behalf of our film society. It may be available on a video compilation; perhaps your local library can locate it. It's fun.
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