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I know we had a similar thread, but I had to bring this up, and that one's a pretty old discussion, but:

Today's Philadelphia Daily News ran as a cover today a picture of both Johnny Cash and John Ritter with this headline at the bottom of the page:

Johnnies Go Fately

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! wretch, groan...tacky, tacky, tacky.

Will somebody please fire the creep editor who did this?...wow? ASp?


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That's pretty tasteless, Juan. From what I gather from its web site, it's a tabloid and as such is sacrificing decency to cutsey headlines in competition with the New York (and other) tabloids.

http://www.philly.com/mld/dailynews/


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The worst that I know of is the newspaper that reported on a fire at a psychiatric hospital and ran the headline "Roasted Nuts."


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¡Ay Dios mío![rolleyes]


#112038 09/16/03 10:14 PM
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Here are some future headlines you might enjoy:

NEWS HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2050:

Florida to Be Readmitted to Union

Texas Executes Last Remaining Citizen

Court Clears OLTimeWarnerGE-DisneyCisco-FordRJR-
NabiscoExxon-Mobil Merger

50-Year Study: Diet and Exercise Key to Weight Loss

Baby Conceived Naturally

It Wasn't the Cigarettes - It Was the Ashtrays

Great and Benevolent Galactic Ruler Reveals That Anal
Probes Were "Just For Fun"

Mother Monica Dies: Revered Hero of Bangkok Slums
Overcame Lurid Past With US President

Wealthy Widow Anna Nicole Smith, 83, Weds Handsome
Young Actor. "This Is True Love," He Beams.

Construction Begins On Grenada War Memorial In D.C.

President "Bonecrusher" Jones to Face Chief Justice
"Mad Dog" Ortega In Cage Match

Baltimore Rams Defeat St. Louis Ravens

Pope Phil II Settles Custody Battle With Ex-Wife

Upcoming NFL Draft Likely to Focus On Mutants

Younger Generation's Music Provokes Outrage of Elders

D.C. Zoo to Receive Rare Cow

Authentic "Year 2000 Florida Chad" Sells For $6.9
Million at Sotheby's

Nursing Home Lawsuit Case: Clinton Denies Candy
Striper's Allegations




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I still rate "Gotcha" as the lowpoint of British xenophobia.

http://www.sterlingtimes.co.uk/gotcha1.htm

By chance, the war coincided with a pay strike by the journalists' union so, on the evening of May 2, only a dozen executives, including me, were producing the paper when the first genuinely dramatic war news broke. A news agency reported that the General Belgrano had been hit. Wendy Henry shouted "Gotcha!", not as a suggested headline but as a spontaneous reaction, the kind of black joke common to every newspaper office. MacKenzie seized on it and designed a front page which said: "GOTCHA. Our lads sink gunboat and hole cruiser." The first edition was off stone before more detailed news of the Belgrano's sinking arrived.

It dawned on us that there might have been a huge loss of life, and as Petrie read the agency reports aloud, the mood changed. Realising that "Gotcha" might be inappropriate, MacKenzie drew up another front page with a new headline: "Did 1,200 Argies drown?" The Sun's owner, Rupert Murdoch, happened to walk on to the floor as MacKenzie was completing the new layout and said he didn't see the need to replace "Gotcha". MacKenzie disagreed and subsequent editions carried the less controversial line.

Without a strike, it's likely that the original page one would have been altered so quickly that few copies would have left the building. But the time it took to make the change ensured that hundreds of thousands of the first edition were published and "Gotcha" came to symbolise ever after the Sun's, and MacKenzie's, cynical, jingoistic, bloodthirsty war coverage.

Despite his change of heart, MacKenzie happily embraced the legend of "Gotcha". Indeed, the day after the Belgrano's sinking, the Sun's front page, "ALIVE! Hundreds of Argies saved from Atlantic", played down the fact that 368 men were killed.


http://www.guardian.co.uk/falklands/story/0,11707,657850,00.html


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Jo, I'm afraid the fine points of your post were somewhat lost on me, though I do see that Gotcha isn't just the best headline for a battle report. But: who is/was General Belgrano; I take it that Wendy Henry is/was an employee of the paper and MacKenzie the editor; who or what are Argies?
And, what on earth is a hole cruiser? That sounds like somebody's looking for holes in the ocean!


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General Belgrano was the name of the ship. 'Hole' in hole cruiser is a verb. Argies = Argentinians

Bingley


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Thank you, m---s. 'Hole' in hole cruiser is a verb. [wind riffling my hair e] Um...a cruiser that makes holes? In what?


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Hole is a verb in this case, Jackie, not an adjective. It's parallel to the verb sink:

Our lads sink gunboat and hole cruiser

Got it? Gotcha!


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>(sink gunboat) and hole cruiser..

that is, they put a hole in it but it hasn't sunk (yet).
-ron o.


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I recalled seeing a list of humorous headlines long ago and in my search came across this site:
<http://www.ccl.umist.ac.uk/teaching/material/headlines-ans.html>
One headline included in this collection also relates to the Brit/Argie conflict: BRITISH LEFT WAFFLES ON FALKLANDS


#112046 09/17/03 03:58 PM
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Of course, that had to be an USn headline or it wouldn't have been ambiguous.


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It's parallel to the verb sink:

Our lads sink gunboat and hole cruiser

Ah--headline English! Got it (finally), thanks!

Re: JH's headline--did they leave any syrup, too?



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I would like to go on record as saying that I think it's parbly a tad early to be picking the century's ---st anythang.


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Re:did they leave any syrup, too?

I've never heard of putting grenidine on waffles!


#112050 09/17/03 09:57 PM
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An interesting thing about the site which lists the headlines (a Brit site, by the way) is that it is used as a grammar teaching tool, explaining in grammatical terms why each of the headlines is subject to humorous interpretation. In the case of the British Waffles:

"BRITISH LEFT WAFFLES ON FALKLAND ISLANDS
Double category ambiguity (noun vs verb) for left and waffles. Of interest is that to an American reader, the sentence is not ambiguous, but bizarre, since American English does not have a verb waffle meaning 'prattle', so the only possible reading is the one where left is the verb."

(Not sure we'd get agreement on that statement, since I have heard the term "waffle", connoting vacillation, all my American adult life)



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