Happy Thanksgiving, USns...

A Thanksgiving List by Andy Borowitz

I’m thankful to the producers of “Stuart Little 2”, for making a film that seems to have greatly reduced the chances of a “Stuart Little 3.”

I’m thankful to the executives of VH1 for pulling the plug on the reality show “Liza and David,” since a program about Liza Minnelli’s marriage couldn’t really be considered a reality show.

I’m thankful for the emergence of a public figure who finally justifies our trust – the Anaheim Angels’ Rally Monkey. tsanks, tsuwm!

I’m thankful for the scientists at the Coca Cola Company, who turned mankind’s long-elusive dream of a diet vanilla cola beverage into a reality.

I’m thankful to Mr. and Mrs. Blix for naming their son "Hans,” because I think “Hans Blix” is just about the coolest name I’ve ever heard.

I’m thankful to CBS for airing the “Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show,” although I secretly fear that Fruit-of-the-Loom will demand equal time.

I’m thankful for the urgent news alert crawl on CNN, which informed me that Rosie O’Donnell had taken her name off her magazine.

I’m thankful for Kelly Ripa, who continues to be our nation’s best defense against the return of Kathie Lee Gifford.

I’m thankful to J. Lo and Ben Affleck for announcing their engagement, since the suspense was killing me.

I’m thankful to Michael Jackson for making all of my parenting look perfect.

I’m thankful for Winona Ryder, who showed that security measures seem to be working in at least one place in this country – Saks Fifth Avenue.

I’m thankful for whoever came up with the term “perp walk.”

And finally, I’m thankful for how the election turned out – on “The West Wing.”

**** HAPPY THANKSGIVING FROM THE BOROWITZ REPORT ****

http://www.borowitzreport.com/

I'm thankful I don't know what much of this means.

Happy Thanksgiving, Usns...

Didn't your Northern neigbours have theirs a fortnight or so back? That one appears to passed unremarked upon - how typically self-effacing of the Canucks here.

... and here was me, thinking that Thanksgiving is tomorrow!

Myself, I give thanks that we don't celebrate Thanksgiving over here, not out of any particular antipathy to Thanksgiving but because we have had Santa wearing a witches hat and clutching a rocket in his left hand since the end of September - one more festival, how ever worthy, would be two too many.

But I wish a really joyful Thanksgiving to all me USn friends and acquaintances and to all of those who will fall into one or other of those categories over the next year.

And let us all hope to the utmost that the year will bring many things to Give Thanks about.

all the best to all y'all

Hilary

we have had Santa wearing a witches hat and clutching a rocket in his left hand since the end of September

Well, maybe ifn you had you a nother major holiday in there it would starve off the inrush of Santas for a little bit.

No way - we'd just have Santa in witches hat, with rocket in left hand and recipe for pumpkin pie in the other.

Didn't your Northern neigbours have theirs a fortnight or so back?

'Twas more like a triple-fornight ago. It was October 14, to be exact (the second Monday in October), which already seems so long ago. Anyway, my particular thankfulness that day involved being invited over to someone else's house so as not to have to make turkey myself (which is a LOT of work).

Anyway, to the topic at hand: I wish all the USns a good Thanksgiving, too!

Ah, I love Thanksgiving here in the US.

I probably love it most because it is a celebration of the harvest season and marks the time just after the end of the growing season. Most often, if not always, we've had our first frost here in Virginia. There's something deeply symbolic about celebrating the harvest and giving thanks that there has been a harvest to celebrate.

And there is such richness in the food traditionally offered:

pumpkins
squash
dressing
gravy
cranberries--wow! so strong!
huge turkeys (most people I know serve breasts instead of doing the whole bird)
all kinds of pies (one family I know has over 12 different types of pies)
succotash

...and so on. Nothing really new up there in my list, but those offerings to the Thanksgiving crowd seem so rich, plentiful, and colorful. I suppose that somehow by seeing so much, I feel the fulness of the harvest. And I like having the day to be focused on the harvest and the national gratitude for it.

Fortunately, I haven't seen a Santa with a blunderbuss in his hands, but that sure doesn't mean it ain't happenin' somewhere!

Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving to everybody who's celebrating it, whether feeding the homeless or greeting friends and family who've traveled near and far to be thankful together.

And so here we are in Glorious New England, on the eve of Thanksgiving, with three inches of snow in the ground and more falling...ah well. As they say, if you don't like the weather here, just wait fifteen minutes.

Happy (I-don't-have-to-dream-any-more-of-a-White) Thanksgiving, everybody!

Speaking of cranberries...chances are those cranberries that adorn your Thanksgiving feasts as sauce or garnish come form Massachusetts, Wisconsin, or the famous Pineland cranberry bogs of Southern New Jersey!

http://www.online96.com/cranberry/

THE CRANBERRY MEANT PEACE

Long before the first white settlers came into the area, the Lenni-Lenape Indians, a branch of the Algonquins, made their home in the river valleys of what is now South and central New Jersey. The first known harvesters of the cranberry in the state, the Lenni-Lenapes, used the wild red berry for food. The Lenni-Lenape word for the berry was "pakim", meaning "noisy berry".

(for the rest of this story click here...):

http://www.burlco.lib.nj.us/pinelands/cranber.htm

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

And I'm sooo thankful that I'm a vulture and not a turkey right now! gobble, gobble

Happy Thanksgiving, Everybody!

I'm thankful for many things, but am thankful for all of you. We have so much fun here. And we even occasionally learn a thing or two or three.

Best regards for a happy day of feasting and thankfulness,
Theresa

perp walk?

I expect that's some kind of a swagger when the accused knows he's gonna win in court -- also known as "the perp'll reign."

Happy harvest festival to all!

ah TEd, you're such a Prince.

happy Thanksgiving, all!