One of my favorite bloggers is putting together a collection of obnoxious schoolyard rhymes from around the world, like
Baby, baby
Stick your head in gravy
Wash it out with bubble gum
and send it to the Navy
I though with our diverse collection of nations and cultures represented we could surely come up with a few for him. The collection is archived at:
http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/cat_global_schoolyard_rhyme_project.html
One of my favorites so far is from Japan:
Tan-Tan-Tanuki no kintama wa
Kaze mo nai no ni
Bura bura bura
English Translation:
The Fox-Fox-Foxdog's testicles are
Despite there being no wind blowing,
Swaying, swaying, swaying.
Flat,
belMarduk started a thread a long time ago, during your hiatus, asking us to post the rhymes and songs we remember from childhood. I think it was in Miscellany, maybe you or one of our brilliant searchers here could find it and bring it back up to the top. There you might find some appropriate for your friend's site.
PS love the Japanese one!
Thanks, Anna. I've lazarized the thread you mentioned, but it's not exactly what I'm looking for. The rhymes in that thread are more of the hand-clapping/jump-roping style, while the Global Schoolyard Rhymes Project is about the more mean-spirited taunting rhymes that I suspect we all were subjected/subjected others to at one time or another.
Tanuki Tanuki is a canid and usually called a raccoon dog (Nyctereutes procyonoides). They exist in eastern Europe and China and Japan. Tanuki is a trickster in Japanese folktales and is considered the patron god of restauranteurs. I saw a good mid-sized statue of him last night in the sushi bar I ate at. He is distinguished by huge testicles. Really big. 6 or 8 tatami mats big. Sometimes a thousand tatami mats (senjojiki). He likes to disguise himself as a human sometimes and buy saki from a dealer. When he disappears, after drinking, the dealer is left with some leaves he though was money.
http://www.onmarkproductions.com/html/tanuki.shtml
[from jheem's link]In the computer game "Super Mario Brothers," when Mario gets a leaf, he gains pointy ears and the tail of a Tanuki.
OH! Now I understand. I always wondered why leaf=raccoon in that game. I guess it might not have been such a family-friendly hit if Mario had gained Tanuki's other distinguishing trait!
A hundred year old one, to a squealer:
Tattle tale tit
Your tongue shall be split
And every dog in town
Shall have a bit of it.
And who can forget the classic:
Nyah-nyah-nya-nya-nyah-nyaah!
to the tune of the same name.
A silly one from Cape Cod:
Red.Red!
Wet the bed.
Wipe it up
With ginger bread!
Courtesy of my son, who apparently didn't realize that he needed to change the sexes around:
Girls go to college to get more knowledge;
Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider.
From my childhood in the Ozark Mountains:
What's your name
Puddin' tain (sp?)
Ask me again
and I'll tell you the same.
And there was [first name here]
Swinging on the outhouse door
Without her nightie
Swinging on the outhouse door
and there was [second name here]
tellin' her to swing some more.
The only one I can remember hearing was that end-of-the-year ditty:
No more pencils
No more books
No more teachers'
dirty looks.
I think most schoolground nasties are tailored to the specific individual and don't work for any other.
Well, OK.
Have you ever seen a funeral go by?
Did you ever think you'd be the next to die?
They wrap you up in a big white sheet,
And throw you in a hole, six foot deep.
The worms crawl in.
The worms crawl out.
The worms play pinochle on your snout.
And:
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school,
We have tortured every teacher, we have broken every rule.
[Mumble, mumble. (Lyrics?)]
Glory, glory, hallelujah,
Teacher hit me with a ruler.
Hit her in the bean with a rotten tangerine.
And she don't teach no more.
Altnerative line:
Waited at the door with a loaded .44.
arghhhh, now you've done it jheem. I can't get that last ditty outta my mind. I know the missing lyrics. They're right there, taunting my, hiding in the back of my mind...grrrr.
We had the same ditty but some of the words were different...
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school,
We've tortured all the teachers, and we broke the golden rule.
mumble, mumble. (Lyrics?)]
Glory, glory, hallelujah,
Teacher hit me with a ruler.
shot er in the head, and now she's really dead
And she ain't gonna teach no more.
here's one version:
http://sniff.numachi.com/~rickheit/dtrad/pages/tiBURNSCHL;ttJOHNBRWN.htmlThe Burning of the School
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school,
We have beaten every teacher, we have broken every rule!
We have smashed up all the blackboards, we have thrown out all the books*
The school is burning down.
Glory, glory, hallelujah!
Teacher hit me with a ruler,
I bopped her on the bean with a rotten tangerine,
And I won't go to school no more.
*or "We have wandered down the halls writing cuss words on the walls"
Sorry about that. The class I enjoyed the most as an undergraduate was Intro Folklore, taught by Alan Dundes. Anonymous jokes, riddles, gnomic utterances, songs, poems, xerographics and faxes, etc. The size of the class was huge, over 200, the reading long, but interesting, but he was one of the better lecturers I had.
Liar, liar, pants on fire
Can't jump over the telephone wire!
Liar, liar, pants on fire
Who? Me or Dundes?