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Posted By: Capital Kiwi Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 04:34 PM
This just in from an alternative news source:

The ground war in Afghanistan heated up yesterday when the Allies revealed plans to airdrop a platoon of crack French existentialist philosophers into the country to destroy the morale of Taliban zealots by proving the non-existence of God.

Elements from the feared Jean-Paul Sartre Brigade, or 'Black Berets', will be parachuted into the combat zones to spread doubt, despondency and existential anomie among the enemy - ANS.




hehehehe, cute.


k

Posted By: WhitmanO'Neill Re: Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 04:59 PM
Yeahbut®...how could it be over when everybody'll know there is NO EXIT?

And will the 'Camus Platoon' play a part in this operation?

Posted By: wwh Re: Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 05:31 PM
Instead of on the Taliban and Al-queda, the existentialist philosophers ought to be turned loose on the mad mullahs of the madrasas who are teaching the joys of dying to receive 72 virgins in a non-existent paradise.

Posted By: Capital Kiwi Re: Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 05:41 PM
Come on Bill. We all know that you'd swap something as overrated as life for even the teensiest, weeniest chance of a crack at 72 virgins any time!

Posted By: boronia Re: Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 05:41 PM
I received a longer version:
French Intellectuals to be Deployed in Afghanistan

The clean-up portion of the ground war in Afghanistan heated up yesterday when the Allies revealed plans to airdrop a platoon of crack French existentialist philosophers into the country to destroy the morale
of the remaining Taliban zealots by proving the non-existence of God.

Elements from the feared Jean-Paul Sartre Brigade, or 'Black Berets', will be parachuted into the combat zones to spread doubt, despondency and existential anomie among the enemy. Hardened by numerous intellectual battles fought during their long occupation of Paris's Left Bank, their first action will be to establish a number of sidewalk cafes at strategic points near the front lines. There they will drink coffee and talk animatedly about the absurd nature of life and man's lonely isolation in the universe. They will be accompanied by a number of heartbreakingly beautiful girlfriends who will further spread dismay by sticking their tongues in the philosophers' ears every five minutes and looking remote and unattainable to everyone else.

Their leader, Colonel Marc-Ange Belmondo, spoke yesterday of his confidence in the success of their mission. Sorbonne graduate Belmondo, a very intense and unshaven young man in a black pullover, gesticulated wildly and said, "The Taliban are caught in a logical fallacy of the most ridiculous type. There is no God and I can prove it."

Marc-Ange plans to deliver an impassioned thesis on man's nauseating freedom of action with special reference to the work of Foucault and the films of Alfred Hitchcock.

However, humanitarian agencies have been quick to condemn the operation as inhumane, pointing out that the effects of passive smoking from the Frenchmen's endless Gitanes could wreak a terrible toll on civilians in the area.

Posted By: Capital Kiwi Re: Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 05:43 PM
I thought there must be more, but I wasn't sent a link.

Thanks Boronia.

Posted By: WhitmanO'Neill Re: Finally - the end of Afghanistan! - 03/21/02 07:41 PM
Marc-Ange plans to deliver an impassioned thesis on man's nauseating freedom of action with special reference to.......the films of Alfred Hitchcock.

I guess that would have to be Vertigo then, huh?


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