My dictionary lists "neap" as an adjective. Only usage I have ever seen is "neap tide".
I challenge the board to find its use any other way. (I cannot.)

Don't tell me it takes a neap of living to make a house a home.

The height between high-water mark at neap tide and mean low-water mark at spring tide is called the neap rise. [Encycl. Brit., 1888]

OK. For a possible example: neap flush - the result of putting two bricks into WC storage tank.
Formerly recommended to conserve water.

...often served with haggis.

Speaking of ;haggis, I read yesterday it did not originate in Scotland, but in England.
I'll have to find t;hat reference again.

http://www.tower.org/kitchen/recipes/dinner/haggis.html

isn't there a Monty Python skit with Neap?

Neap, Neap, Neap? where they say Neap, as has been suggested that "rhubard" , is sometimes used.. a background word to suggest conversation.

in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. unfortunately, it's the Knights who say "Ni".

http://www.intriguing.com/mp/

actually, this one is better:
http://graphicszone.net/monty_python/scripts/Holy_Grail/Scene12.htm

Speaking of haggis, I read yesterday it did not originate in Scotland, but in England

Ah, but no oatmeal in this recipe, Bill. Vital ingredient, methinks! The closest current English equivalent to haggis is faggots, but it's a way off, albeit yummy.

Neaps = carrot & swede, eh, Auntie?

I could handle being a Scot!

Neaps = carrot & swede, eh, Auntie?

Dunno, Fiskling.... allus thought it was taters & swede (turnip to USns) but.

allus thought it was taters & swede

McAuntie, I was just thinking you may as well call neaps and tatties "swede and double tatties" if that were the case, then checked out this site:
http://www.hwatson.force9.co.uk/cookbook/menus/burns.htm

So basically neaps are (mashed) turneaps = turnips = swede[ish turnip], and nothing more. Funny, I was almost sure there was more to them than that, and should know really, as my best mate is a Scot.

...as my best mate is a Scot.

Then you at least know about the uneven-legged mountainside-dwelling haggis, mein ephew.

>uneven-legged mountainside-dwelling haggis

the gyascutis?! the Side-hill Lancer??

a whumpahoofus...

Then you at least know about the uneven-legged mountainside-dwelling haggis

Oh yes Nauntie. Very useful creatures - you eat the insides and make wind instruments out of the outsides.

And the sound of the instruments is uncannily similar to the death-wail of the little beasties...